Since The Beginning

Chapter Four

Most would assume that gods did not dream. That we all slept peacefully perfectly at ease throughout the slumber but I could attest to that and say it was a falsehood. Just as demigods received nightmares gods did too. Mostly from past events, things that left their mark on us.

Under normal circumstances very little bothered me. I was quite capable of brushing things off and forgetting them it did no good to dwell on the past. Yet there were select events in my life that left traumatic marks. Things that were pivotal in creating the person I was today.

It would just so happen that I was destined to suffer a restless sleep tonight. Images clouded my head and invaded the dark behind my eyelids. As usual the memory that came first was one that always invoked a strong emotional response from me.

Orion. It was one of the periods in my life that I could not stand to think about. I had been impressed by his skill and nothing more. He was the one who restored a small ounce of faith in me that maybe I had not given the men of the world enough credit.

I had made it clear from the beginning there was a line that was not to be crossed or severe consequences would be suffered. He had assured me that it would never come to such a thing. Looking back on it I should have listened to Zoë.

She had been the only one of us who remained uneasy about his presence. The two despised one another and would often argue until it nearly resulted in a brawl. Frankly I thought it was rather irrational and stupid on both of their parts. Although a small part of me was intrigued as to why Zoë hated him with such a hellish passion.

When I confronted her about the topic she told me that it was not something easily explainable. That she simply sensed that there was something off with him. I shrugged it off at the time which would only lead to my later regret and self hate for not heading her words.

The line that was never supposed to be crossed would not only be stepped over but leapt over. It had started off subtly at first. Little things that to an untrained eye as mine would go unnoticed. Flirtatious advances were a foreign language to me. What sound was to a dead person. Unknown and empty.

I should have paid attention more to the behaviors around me. More particularly the way Zoë reacted to such small gestures. If I had thought she despised him before it reached an all new intensity one I did not understand at the time and still confused me.

She hardly ever left my side much to Orion's disapproval. It was almost as if Zoë was trying to protect me from him, separate us. Alas she could not always remain at my side and Orion quickly ceased the opportunity.

What exactly happened I cannot precisely say. It was very much like a blur in after thought. All I recalled was my reaction. The desperate but quick grasp of an arrow and the action afterwards which resulted in blood. Too much blood. Pouring over my hands and onto the floor of my tent even staining a few animal skins.

I would later burn the skins eager to try and remove the event from my memory. Only I couldn't I could still recall the agonized roar and the panic that ensured afterwards. A shiver trailed its way down my spine.

The sensation of a crushing weight slamming down onto my shoulders and the temporary black that invaded my vision. The searing pain of supporting something so heavy. I could try my best to describe it yet the comparison would not be enough.

It was similar to holding the weight of every fear, every doubt, every emotion you'd ever experienced crashing down onto you with an intense ferocity. One that made your knees shake and your vision swim. Your stomach would tie in knots and to accompany it all the form hold of metal grasping at your ankles and arms to lock you in place.