Bucket List [ Wolfstar ]

ch. 6

[ a/n  sigh this is kinda short but i was losing motivation for this fic so i don't think i'll make it too long. i just really want to finish it and my brother thinks it should be 20 chapters but i aint up for that right now oops but i have lots more fanfic ideas but just not for this book ya know?? ok maybe i'll just write a lot of chapter so i can finally finish this thing ]

The morning felt deadly silent, ice cold as if it was a harsh winter already. Yet winter had barely begun. Dead leaves scattered across the ground as fall as coming to a slow end. 

      The group had walked in silence to the hospital wing, none had the nerve to talk, or could even form words at this point. They could hear people talking quietly, and the shuffling and scraping of their shoes again the dirty path. Barely anyone was bursting out of their dorms with happiness or want to be outside in the cold though so there wasn't much noise to fill the void of silence. 

        Though, the odd sort of silence ended when they reached the hospital wing. It was a white building, small mostly. It wasn't special or anything, but it was enough. All four students quickly rushed inside trying to get out of the cold as fast as they could manage to do so. They were thankful of the fact that there was heat in the Hospital Wing. 

Once inside(and they had all warmed up for a few minutes), Remus pushed away his numbness and pulled himself together. He took control of talking, pushing himself in front, but still hesitant to talk. Although forced, his voice sounded so natural and fine despite what he felt. 

"Hello, Madam Pomfrey. Is Sirius okay?"

She looked up to see who spoke, keeping her face in the same emotion. She let a slight smile fall onto her face, motioning for him and his friends to follow.

Remus pushed himself in front of everyone once again, letting out a gasp when he saw Sirius. Sirius was okay, he laid in the stiff, uncomfortable hospital bed, awake and looking healthier than before.His body was covered in a white hospital blanket. He rushed forward to greet Sirius. He hugged Sirius tightly, breathing heavily and a racing heart in his chest.

"I'm so glad you're okay."

"Um, let's give Remus some time with Sirius for a bit, okay?" Madam Pomfrey announced, shooing Peter, James, and Lily out.

Lily nodded, pushing James out while Peter trailed a few steps behind. The room was silent for awhile more as Remus still held onto Sirius. Remus finally realized what he was doing, and slowly let go of grasp on Sirius. He stumbled back, away from Sirius awkwardly, an obvious blush falling on his cold cheeks. A grin was plastered on his lovely face now as he stared at Remus who was still blushing still, staring at the ground rather than Sirius. 

Remus looked up regardless of what he was feeling right now. 

"Are you okay, Sirius?" 

"I guess... It must've been quite a shock when I fainted, huh?" Sirius joked.

Remus glared at Sirius, not fond of his idiotic joking. He shook his head angrily.

"Yeah, actually... It was. Why didn't you tell me about your panic attacks? Hell, why didn't anyone know?" Remus asked, lowly. 

Sirius gulped, running a hand through his hair once before speaking through his dry lips. His eyes lingered on Remus for a second but the intensely worried stare Remus gave him made him look away, and shift in his bed. 

"Th-they started happening last summer. I didn't know how to tell anyone or how to handle what it was... M-My... ugh. My 'father' was being extra horrible this summer..." Sirius choked out finally.

Remus covered his mouth, his hazel eyes starting to fill with tears. He slowly took a few steps forward to get to Sirius' bed. His heart felt heavy as he brought Sirius in for another hug. This one was more emotional both boys couldn't help but hold on tight to each other. Their hearts were pounding and heavy all at once, pain surrounding themselves but also something was so secure about this. 

Yet, it couldn't last forever.They ended up letting go of each other, instantly feeling cold from the loss. Remus smiled sadly, pressing his lips to Sirius' forehead out of habit. He blushed afterward, his hazel eyes wide from his own action. Sirius started smiling like a lovesick idiot, giving Remus a bit more life. 

"S-sorry! I-uh should go... James and Lily and Peter will want to see you. " Remus quietly said, stumbling over words.

Sirius nodded, waving to him as he left the room stumbling over his own feet. Sirius smiled, wanting to laugh at how cute he was acting so badly. He didn't have much time because his other friends greeted him. They asked familiar questions as always. He answered in an annoyed, strained voice. No one likes to be asked a million times a day if they are feeling okay. After that was settled, James started to grin transforming back to his regular self. He had prepared just about a million stories and jokes to tell Sirius. Sirius enjoyed them even if he heard them before because he was happy to see his friends again. 

Finally, Sirius could leave. Remus was nowhere to be seen, which was the cause of Sirius' slumped shoulders. He then realized another annoying fact. As his friends walked with him back to the dorms, their quiet conversation served its purpose as background noise. It felt so far away, they felt far away like the talking was muffled rain. His heart stopped when he realized one simple fact. God, he is so stupid. His stomach started to twist around itself, and he needs to know... 

Did Remus like him too?