A Year Abroad (Hermione/Viktor)

Difficult Choices

Viktor itched to ask Hermione about Sofia in summer, but the moment never felt quite right. He was terrified that she would say no, and he was unsure where and with whom she would spend her summer if not with him.

Hermione sat in the lunchroom, today was one of the days that she could not eat with Viktor. They had seen each other every day since they had been back, but had eaten together very rarely. Hermione usually ate with Seamus when Viktor wasn't around. She enjoyed his calm, cool energy.
"Hermione," He began. She placed down her spoon and diverted all of her attention to him.
"What is it Seamus?" She asked.
"I've been meaning to talk with you about something." His head tucked into his chest and his eyes remained staring at the floor.
"Seamus, what is it?" She repeated her question, becoming worried.
"I-I'm thinking of staying." Seamus exhaled, finally looking up at Hermione.
"At Durmstrang?" She asked and he nodded silently.
"I love it here. I am left alone to look after the owls and study and with those little translators, I have no problems at all." He smiled up at her.
"What have your family said?" She asked, knowing how close Seamus was with his family.
"They are the ones who suggested it. At Christmas, they saw how much better I was and they asked me what had changed. This place is right for me, it's better than Hogwarts, if you can believe it." He smiled down at his hands.
"I know it is." She placed her palm over his. Hermione had seen Seamus flourish at Durmstrang, becoming a fine young man.
"This is very brave of you." Hermione whispered, feeling her inner conflict rage on.
"No, Hermione. This is the easiest thing I have ever done." He smiled at her and she saw the stress and anxiety drain from his face. Seamus was content in his decision and Hermione could not wait to feel that way, once her decision had been made.

Viktor was training hard, harder than before. He had allowed himself to slack off, so he was pushing himself to get himself back to his physical peak. Mentally, however, he was a mess. He had Hermione and this made him immensely happy. But, the pressure of asking her to stay with him and the stress of having to decide what he was doing about his degree weighed down on him.

Chigvintsev had noticed that Viktor was struggling, so he called him into his office.
"Viktor, what's going on?" He asked in Bulgarian.
"Nothing, I am fine, Sir." Viktor bluffed and Chigvintsev knew.
"That is not the truth. Talk to me about your degree. What are you thinking?" Viktor sighed, he knew he would have to talk about it at one point or another, but he just wished he could push it to another.
"I don't know what to do. Bulgaria are offering me a full time contract to play for my country, but then I wouldn't be here."
"Listen, Viktor. You are a brilliant seeker, the best I have ever seen. It would be a waste of your time to stay here and study a degree. If you want my advice, I would tell you to go to Bulgaria and live your life, play for your team." Chigvintsev stated.
"But then I only have a few months left at Durmstrang. If I am chosen to come with you for the Triwizard Tournament." Viktor insured himself with the final phrase.
"Viktor you have been at this school for five years. I am sure you have many wonderful memories here, but this is not your lifelong home. You need to be out there, living your life. You are only eighteen, do this while you are still so young!" Chigvintsev urged him. Viktor knew it was what he wanted, he knew that he wanted to play for Bulgaria, but there was one thing stopping him: Hermione.

Hermione tossed and turned every night since Seamus told her about his relocation. She didn't know what she wanted. She loved Hogwarts, but then she hadn't loved it when she returned with Durmstrang. She came to the conclusion that she loved her memories of Hogwarts. But Durmstrang was real, Durmstrang was now. She looked within herself and she was happy, Durmstrang helped her in her healing. Knowing that Seamus would be there with her made the prospect that much more inviting. But she couldn't make the decision to commit, she didn't know what to do.

Hermione had invited Mcgonagall to Durmstrang for afternoon tea and they sat, in one of the lounges, overlooking the river.
"Hermione, tell me what's wrong. Please, I want to help." Mcgonagall pleaded.
"I don't know what to do." Hermione felt her walls begin to break as she admitted how she felt.
"What do you mean?"
"Seamus is staying at Durmstrang after the year and I don't know if I want to do the same." Hermione admitted, sighing. Mcgonagall was shocked to hear Hermione speak of plans to move permanently.
"The only advice I can give you is to think of yourself. Don't think of what Dumbledore will think, don't think of what Harry Potter will say, don't think about Viktor Krum or Chigvintsev or Seamus, think about yourself." Her speech was slow and definite.
"I have changed so much since being here. I have had to learn to be on my own, learn to deal with my thoughts. I have been treated terribly and then gained the respect of the men here. I don't have my dreams anymore, I don't break out in cold sweats. Chigvintsev is helping me in ways I can not describe and Dorfinde has helped me set up a business." Hermione looked down at her cup of tea as she spoke.
"I can't go back there, I don't think I can. When I was there, the weight of my actions weighed down on me, I felt it in their stares, on my shoulders. Here, I am one of Durmstrang, not part of a house that competes, not a girl that saved the world. We are one and there is a calm solidarity in that." Hermione felt herself rambling on. Mcgonagall smiled at her. She always knew Hermione was destined for more that just the walls of Hogwarts. She sighed.
"I think you have your answer." She smiled.
"It shall be such a shame to lose you." She admitted.
"You won't lose me. I shall visit. I just can't live there." Hermione was shocked at the wave of serenity that washed over her.
"You are a braver woman than I, Hermione Granger. But then you always were." Mcgonagall embraced Hermione before she left, she knew Hermione would be scared, but she also knew that she would be grateful in a year's time, for making this decision.