Confessions of A School Slut: A Story about Slut-Shaming ✓

Chapter Eighteen (Part One)

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Chapter Eighteen

When you're fifteen, there are certain things in life that don't hold as much of a meaning as some other do. At that time, when someone assumed me to be a lesbian, I took it as the biggest insult I could ever have. Even bigger than being called a slut. What I didn't realize at that time all those years ago was that homosexuality is a common trait, one that shouldn't be degraded.

Over the years, incidents have helped me understand how homosexuality is nothing to be ashamed of. Just like Aisha wasn't ashamed that day in the restaurant. Only, this incident wasn't one that showed me this.

As soon as we arrived home, my mother was surprised to see me return with Manas and Papa.

"What happened to Aisha?" Mummy asked. I stayed still, still not sure of how to respond.

"So you were there with a girl, huh?" Papa observed. "I thought it was a boy."

I shook my head.

"What is it, dear? What happened?" Mummy repeated. Manas looked around, probably uncomfortable at the situation. I wanted to do something to make him feel more at home, but I had no idea what. But after everything that had happened that day...

"She almost sexually assaulted me," I finally spoke, probably exaggerating things a little bit.

Mamma came in for a hug. I finally broke down. For a long while, I cried. A lot. Papa and Manas stood there watching me lose it. Soon after, she left to get us a glass of water each while Papa went to freshen up, leaving Manas and me alone in the living room.

"Riddhika," Manas began. "I know this isn't the right time, but maybe you should consider telling them about it..."

"About what?" I asked as I slowly wiped away my tears.

"You know...this..." He eyed toward my hand and stared at it for a second longer than necessary. Unable to feel comfortable under his tensed gaze, I stretched my sleeves to cover my wrists and palms.

"No!" I almost yelled at him. "It will hurt them. Terribly."

"You anyway have to tell them at some point or another, don't you, Riddhi?" he tried to reason. "It's a huge thing."

I didn't budge. Instead, I shook my head to signify my decision.

Before we could continue more on the topic, Mummy returned with two glasses of water and handed one to each of us.

After that, I continued sobbing. No one asked me why. They just let me do it.

By the time I was done, it was already 11 in the night. Mummy wasn't ready to let Manas go out this late, especially considering how foggy it was outside. Thus, he had to agree by staying the night. He called his mother to take her permission. It took some convincing but when Mummy talked to her, the issue was soon resolved. He spent the night.

Later that night, when Manas had gone to sleep in my brother's room, Mummy came to check up on me. I narrated her the whole incident as it was. She watched me sadly as she heard each part of the story with dismay.

Somewhere in between all of this, tears resurfaced. She didn't stop them. I didn't hide them. That night, she let me cry my eyes out again. Finally, after an hour or two, even though she was reluctant to return to her room, I forced her to go.

However, before she could go after watching me cry for yet another time, I called her.

"There's something else that I need to tell you, Mummy," I whispered. It was loud enough for her to hear. She turned around and returned to the bed to sit next to me. Her eyes looked at me with concern. I tried to smile, but I wasn't able to.