three

14

"How am I fucking dead, Camila?! I'm breathing for fuck's sake!" I argued back. I was in denial, not wanting to think that I am dead and in a Spirit Realm with a pyschopath who goes by the name Camila. She gave me a disapproving look and she shakes her head. It took her a couple of seconds before she gave in an answer to me and my curiousness.

"I didn't mean to kill you that night Tristan left for his practice. I killed you by a kiss," she murmured. No one can ever be murdered by a kiss. This girl is giving me more unsatisfying lies by the mere minute.

"That's quite impossible if you think about it," I let out a sarcastic laugh. She held her gaze with me and never bothered to take it away.

She wiped off the tears that formed on her eyes that went down her mascara stained cheeks. "I know. But after all that you've seen about me? Don't you think the impossible exists by now?" she questioned as if she knew better than I did.

She didn't smile. I didn't smile. I was starting to believe her again but before I protested to her statement, she speaks again.

"All the tantrums and crazy things happening to me? Those are all my attempts in trying to get us out! It worked out before but now, it just keeps on glitching." Her voice breaks on the end, she began sobbing noiselessly. I watched and listened in confusion. She talked about how it worked before, so that meant this wasn't my first time being in the Spirit Realm.

"Then why am I stuck here with you if I'm the one who died?!" I shouted in angst. I tried holding back that feeling, it wasn't essential right now.

"Because I have no heart," she continued, "it's with you." The bewilderment I was enduring cannot be put into words. I remained speechless. Imagine someone telling you that their heart was with you and they do not have any. Seconds passed by, we were probably waiting for one another to speak.

"So a part me of me died along with you. We're both stuck with each other until I get us out, but it's not working," she quietly said.

Tears continued to journey down her face as she went on with speaking. "You died five years ago and got sent here in the Spirit Realm. I sacrificed myself and got sent here too. I took your heart out and replaced it with mine so you can have another chance to live again. You deserved that chance, Y/N. I was heartless when I came back to earth after you. All my humanity, faith, hope, sanity, everything went with you. I can't give a shit to anyone even if I wanted to. When I'm with you, the euphoria keeps coming back to me and I want that. That's why I feel different emotions when you are around me."

It completely took me a few moments to process all what she was letting out on me because it was overwhelming. Perplexing and astonishing at the same time. My fingers started trembling once again, her eyes turned into the shade of the ocean.

"I love you," I said, unaudibly.

She lifted her head up to me, her eyes turning blue-green. She gives me a soft smile. "No, you don't get it. Being in love doesn't mean wanting the attention I give you. You don't love me, you think you do because I will be here in every step of the way even in your darkest times. So no, you never loved me. But me? Fucking hell, I love you."

I traced the feeling of hurt and genuine in her tone and the words she used. I kept my opinions to myself for I was taken aback by her sentences. We stayed silent until she made the decision in walking towards me. I kept still on my postion and she stopped when she was close enough, leaning in her forehead to mine as her lips were brushing on my own.

"I cannot stop loving you. Love is like a disease, you do not have the power to stop it. You don't get to make that choice. My only regret today is loving the wrong person," she mumbled against my lips, almost kissing me completely.

She grabbed the back of my head, gently pushed it to kiss me, and I kissed back. This was more meaningful than the previous action I shared with her weeks ago. As much as I wanted more, she pulled away and detached me from her body.

"But there is one choice that I can make," she whispered lowly and she stepped backwards—away from me, snapping her fingers and a pistol appeared in her hand.

"Don't do it, please Camila," I begged and saw the tears drop from her eyes and down to her cheeks again. Seeing her vulnerable like this didn't add up to the situation.

"There's no point in it anymore, Y/N," she continued, "My parents? Murdered. My sister? Murdered. My whole extended family? Murdered. My will to live? Extracted. Chance to learn love? Done. I love you."

She shut her eyes tightly.

I was going to react quickly and take the weapon from her but she pointed it to her forehead and pulled the trigger, having blood splattered on the room behind her. The deafening sound that the weapon has formed came to my senses but everything went somewhat silent right here and there when I saw her now lifeless body constantly fall to the ground. Before I can do anything else, everything turned white in my sight. It took place all too fast.

Was it a mistake in not being able to love her enough?

Was it a mistake in not being able to love her enough?

Was it a mistake in not being able to love her enough?

That's the worst thing about it, no questions can be answered because all that's left now is regret.

you have
reached the end.
congratulations.