rants n stuff

dead lizard stuff

     i was really bored and i dunno but i just remembered this one time my friend killed a lizard and we had a funeral and everything woo.

     anyways, this bitch (jk you aren't a bitch ily), she literally chopped this poor dude in half after he was already fucking dead. i mean, we were messing around in her front yard, by we i mean me, her, and two other of our friends, and i don't even remember exactly what happened but some shit went down and i'm pretty sure she stepped on this poor dude while trying to catch him, (tbh we love catching lizards they're evERYWHERE), and so boom this lil guy is now dead.

      i remember all of us were super mortified because it's guts were literally all over the concrete, and nobody had a clue what to do at the moment. also, one of the other friends is like super loving of animals and sensitive (not a bad thing tho) and she almost crIED. it was defiantly something in all honesty. 

     it was kinda funny because all of us had way different reactions, i was just like 'what the shit just happened what' while the girl who stepped on it was like 'nO MY POOR BABY' and felt so bad, that other one that i mentioned was so upset and all, and this other girl. this bitch. (shes great tho no hate) she literally DID NOT care. she was kinda watching with what looked like amusement and i bet she was just thinking something like 'these idiots' the whole time because she said nothing and had like a bored expression when the poor guy got fucking squished.

     now, us as a group of people who aren't even teens yet didn't really know what to do with this dead body that literally lay in front of us, and after the initial shock we kinda just stood in a circle staring down on it. tHEN, for some genius reason one of us suggested we bury it. so we went to the field behind their houses (the girl who seemed like she didn't care and the girl who stepped on it live next to each other and theres a field then a forest behind their houses and i live a street away) and got a ton of flowers and whatever we thought looked pretty.

     then this girl (the one who stepped on it) got a small shovel and we started to dig a hole by her house. the girl who didn't seem like she cared kinda stood there and i shit you not she kept saying things like 'hurry up i'm bored' and stuff and i dunno it was annoying as fuck, while the other girl who almost cried who's also a christian (once again, nothing against them) was praying or something (sorry i dunno about it) and me and the last girl were digging a grave. 

     but that is not the end of the goddamn mishaps that happened to this now dead lizard, hell nah. the girl who killed it (by accident) accidentally stabbed it through with the shovel and now we have two halves of a lizard. the other two screamed really loud because there was just lizard everywhere while i was just so fucking confused and thinking something like 'what the actual fuck.' 

     anyways, after a long moment of silence we just put it in the grave and covered it and put some flowers over it, and just stared at it for a while.

     it was really weird to be honest and looking back i find all of it just hilarious (not killing the lizard though). it was super dramatic lmfao