pool » niall horan

;twelve;

mum,

the kiss meant everything to me, and i thought we developed some sort of relationship because of it, but for the next few weeks, she didn't come to the pool at all, and every excuse i tried to come up with failed miserably, leaving me feeling lonely and used. 

nothing, not even the feeling of the water lashing about me calmed me. i was frantic all the time, and sleep deprivation was no help to my appearance. my eyes were bloodshot, my hair untamed, my bodily stench horrible. 

this was exactly like the last time i met a girl, and i vowed that i would never put myself through this pain all over again. i remember you sat me down that night by the fireplace, and you made hot chocolate and you told me that it's normal to love people, and to believe that they're the right one for you, but you will never know who you are in a relationship until you put yourself through relationships, and you will never find the right person for you if you don't put yourself through relationships, and yeah, you'll get hurt, but love isn't a stroll through the park. it's an adventure that has it's ups and downs. it's a roller coaster with flips and turns, back stabs, cheating, lying, betrayal, and hurt. however, if you never try, you'll never get anything out of it, and i know you're right, but that doesn't ease the pain. i'm willing to go through this pain because i wish i had love as strong as you and dad. 

i remember you guys were married for thirty-seven years before you both died that day, and you would still honor the same traditions you had since you first met. i remember that i was so bothered about how you guys would shut me out on wednesday nights because it was your movie night, but when i matured, i admired your love. i began to look up to you and dad because your love was unbreakable, and to the very last day, he was so faithful to you. i know you've been through so much pain before dad, but you've told me that it was so worth it because dad is the right one, and he can mend all the hurt you've been put through. 

-niall

guys 

there's like two-three more parts in this book, and it's over