bonus chapter: That Night (toned down version)

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I'VE POSTED THE 'PRIVATE' CHAPTER EARLIER, but this is the more toned down version for the kiddies under 18 years old (lol)

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BONUS CHAPTER: THAT NIGHT

"But I also love you, Ryder Black."

When he smiled again, I was positive that this was the right thing to be done.

This was all illogical, borderline stupid even. I felt obtuse for diving right into the very thing that had rendered me even less than useless; a burden to the others. When Ryder had left me a few years ago, I had entered a state that I could only describe as 'a profound appreciation of nothingness'. Everything had tasted bland, movies, tv-series, newest announcement of my favorite books turned into movies. Even knowing that Spiderman got a reboot hadn't given me a single drop of joy. It had been a really weird time in my life.

But of course, an emotion as strong as love could have equally strong side-effect as well.

What I didn't know was how much I wanted to feel this kind of emotion again, even after fully experiencing the risks that came with it.

"Oh my stars, I really have gone stupid," I said, not to particularly anyone but myself. "Please ask me the full casts of Lord of the Rings, first billed only."

Ryder looked at me with a deliberate smile. "And why would I want you to say other guy's names in front of me?"

"As proof that my brain is still functioning normally?"

There's a playful glint that slowly inched to be mischievous on Ryder's dark eyes. "That's not the kind of answer I'm hoping for."

"You have to give me a bit of an adjustment period. It's been four years since the last time I ever flirted with anybody," I protested.

"True."

I played with the hem of my t-shirt, suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to get both of my hands inside my mouth. Because I didn't know if I could stop myself from saying inappropiate things, asking the wrong questions, and-

"What about you?" I heard my voice sputtering things I wasn't sure I was ready about.

If Ryder was offended with my question, then he didn't show it. He sat on the table chair and crossed his feet, and I was once again awed at the full display of his lenghtened body. He really had grown up a lot.

"What do you think?" he asked me.

"Four years? You? Single?" once I started, there was no stopping. "Really? I don't know? Not possible?"

He laughed, and it was exactly the kind of laugh that made me miss him. "You silly. Who'd want somebody like me?"

"A lot," I still remembered the way sexually aware girls from the age of 13 to 45 look at him, as if he was food on display. "I don't know if you know, but you look like you can be the type of many girls."

"And what exactly is that?"

"Tall," I said as I took in his full height. Ryder rose from his seat and then approached me, his long legs swinging across each other elegantly. "Doritos body."

He laughed again, and I found another answer to his question. "The way you laugh. Like you're so amused by my simple words."

Ryder smiled, and it was probably the first smile that I'd seen coming from him after such a long time. It was breathtaking, how one basic expression of him could pull at my heartstring, if I have any.

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