Just Can't Let Go (Niall Horan)

Chapter 18

Niall had a lot on his mind lately, most of which had something to do with Lindsey. He was trying to figure out the best way to ask her to be his girlfriend again. He wanted to prove to her he was trying, trying so hard to make it right. He wanted to treat her right, to spoil her, just like the way she should be treated. He wanted to kiss her whenever he felt like it, to lie close with her after a long day apart, and most importantly he just wanted her. He wanted to show her that she was the one, and someday, maybe soon or maybe in years, he would have a family with her. She was his only, and that's all it would ever be.

Niall was so busy himself, he didn't realize how badly Lindsey needed to talk to him. Three days passed where whenever he didn't have to do something for tour, he'd be off on his own. Lindsey would look for him for hours and once she'd actually find him, he would be busy again.

She had gotten a call from her mother, a really bad one in fact, where she just needed to talk to someone about. She wasn't going to change her mind about what she said in return to her mother, but she just needed someone. Someone that would stand by her and tell her everything's okay. That she wasn't alone.

Niall was making her feel alone. As if she had no one, and she hated it. Before she met Niall, she was perfectly fine with being alone. Her dad walked out, her brother died, and her mom was practically a zombie (not that it was her fault. Lindsey never would've blamed it on her mom even if it truly was). Most days it was just her and the monitor that beeped every couple of seconds to signal that Lindsey was still alive. Well, not alive but surviving.

Everything changed when Niall stopped her that one day to ask where Jamie's room was. That was the start of the person she would become, the person that finally had someone that loved her unconditionally and that wouldn't walk away. She finally wasn't alone. Except that all changed just a few months back, and now she felt like things were finally looking you. Her and Niall could work out their problems.

So when Lindsey spotted Niall down the hall in the Dream Hotel in Los Angeles, only about an hour away from where her mom was visiting, she ran to catch up to him.

"Niall!" she yelled trying to grasp his attention for mere minutes. He spun around from the sound of her voice and he smiled. He missed her a lot once he realized how distant he made himself. Tonight, he thought to himself. He was going to ask her tonight.

"Hey babe" he said walking towards her kissing her full on the lips. It was short and sweet, full of love. As soon as the kiss ended, he realized that nothing was set in stone as far as their relationship went. He knew that their still was feelings, but he wasn't sure if that meant he was allowed to kiss her every time he saw her. His worries escaped his thoughts when Lindsey just smiled and savored the kiss, replaying it over and over in her head. He smiled wide looking at her. He thought she looked good as ever, even in sweatpants and a v neck. It made her look real, not that he didn't like when she dressed up. He thought she was beautiful no matter what she wore.

"I've been meaning to talk to you for a few days, but everytime I try to find you, you're M.I.A."

"I know, I'm sorry, I've just been crazy busy" he said thinking over the new dance moves they added to this leg of the tour. He couldn't forget them, or else it would ruin the whole concert.

"I get it, Niall, I do. This tour isn't about me, I'm here for Justin, but I just-" Lindsey said trying to come up with the perfect words.

"What?" Niall asked furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.

"I need -"

"Niall!" one of the tour managers, John, yelled frantically as he left one of the boys hotel room. Lindsey internally groaned, it was as if the universe was trying to tell her something. That her and Niall weren't meant to be, and if they tried to make this work, there would be so many interruptions. She started to think about how if they did work out, how this would probably occur often too. Of course his job and the fans come before her. It was a given. She knew she would end up alone whenever she needed him. His work wasn't stable enough for the broken girl like her.