BEYOND THE LIGHTS «j.p.»

mama's name was lonely

Los Angeles, 2017

It's been two weeks since that magical night on the plane, and Aiden can still feel Rio wrapped around him. It was truly a night to remember, and one he couldn't wait to share with the singer again.

As for their relationship's progress, well, it had been rather slow, but every private moment the two share he cherished. Being around him constantly, however, was getting much harder considering they couldn't touch, or flirt, when they were in public or around others. But that just made their private moments even sweeter.

Aiden has the day off while Rio spent the day in the studio. He was featuring on a track with another artist, and the studio itself had strict security, so Aiden didn't have to show back up until it was time for Rio to leave.

It was a good thing though, considering what today was. The anniversary of his mother's death.

Aiden walks through the graveyard, a bouquet of tulips, his mother's favorite flower, in his hand. He placed them at the base of her headstone and kneels there, looking at her little picture placed in the stone.

"Hey, mama." Aiden says softly, smiling as he feels the same emotion wash over him that happens every year. Sadness, mostly, but a twinge of regret.

His mother never knew the real him, because he's always been too afraid to admit it, to tell her, and regrets not doing that every day he's spent without her.

"It's been a minute since I been by to see you. Sorry about that." Aiden says, rubbing his nose and then shoving his hands in his pockets. "I think I may have saved someone, someone that...I care about a lot."

A smile spreads across Aiden's lips as he thinks about Rio, the smile he sees on the singer's face when they're together, it makes every day worth living. He's the only thing that gets Aiden out of bed everyday.

"I don't know how much you can see up there, but there's something I need to tell you." Aiden continues, his smile fading slowly as he looks down at the green grass on the ground. "I've known for a long time now, I've just always been too afraid to admit it. The truth is, ma, I'm gay."

Even though his mother isn't there to react in person, he still feels like there's been a heavy weight lifted off of his chest, and the more he talks, the more he smiles.

"I met somebody. His name is Rio, and...he's having a hard time, mama. He really is." Aiden says, licking his lips as he continues. "But I think I'm helping him, saving him, and it makes me happy just to see him happy. I think you'd like him a lot."

"Aiden." He hears a deep familiar voice behind him.

He turns around to see his father approaching him with a two bottles of beer in his hand.

"I knew you'd be here." James says, passing Aiden one of the bottles.

"I always come." Aiden says, accepting the beer and popping the cap off, taking a long swig from it. He was definitely going to need to be a little bit out of it if he planned on even carrying a conversation with his father as his mother's grave.

"I know." James says, stepping up next to him, and then he looks down at the headstone with a soft sigh. "The flower's a pretty. She would've liked them."

"Thanks." Aiden says, eyes trained on the headstone.

They stand there in silence for a long while, the wind blowing around them. The tension was thick, so thick that it could be sliced with a knife, and Aiden wanted to get out of there, to leave the awkward situation behind, but he knew that he didn't have much of an escape route. Besides, he needed to be here for his mother...for himself.