"define a gem" says my gruesome English teacher
I stood up with my wobbly legs as its gives me a weak fundamental balance
I try to raise voice for my answer with my fingers playing with themselves as a sign of my anxiousness
I took a deep yet shallow breath and turned to both of my sides, flashing the faces of the
people i undoubtedly hate.
Until I spotted a single guy.
With he's dark hair barely covered he's pale face.
I turn and looked at him.
seeking for he's attention
then he turned he's head.
he sat there, looking at me.
giving me the same face everybody gave me.
he opened with lips with grace and shaped two words that made me explain what a gem really is
im sorry
'a gem is a precious stone, especially when it's cut. it is considered beauty to other countries because of its prestigious glimmering and shine'
I say without hesitation
I sat down, not knowing everybody's eyes were at me.
I sighed as I try not to think the tragedy that happened.
he was my gem
a gem whom i keep and protect. whom i want no man nor maiden shall ever touch.
yet a sensation, a weird feeling that detaches us both from our hearts.
a feeling of distrust, unworthiness and a burst of anxiety.
a dart of doubt hits us both, leaving us restless and helpless.
in each day that passes, i felt drowning as to my gem felt like he was choking.
in each day passes, my gem would stay distracted as i try not to reminisce.
our eyes meet everyday, seeing the same gem I see each day.
yet the hurt was as transparent as water when I saw he's glimmering eyes.
every time we spoke, a wall of unworthiness magically appears between us,
leaving both of us speechless and disturbed.
we both, lovers know what we should do.
yet we both can't.
because the invisible wall of doubt was in between us.
everyday, i tried to shatter the wall that has been tearing our hearts apart
everyday, i tried to swim out of sea that was drowning my lungs
everyday, i tried to stab the hands that was choking us
but, everyday.
all was given to me was hurt.
the darkness at my room was calling for my presence
i crumpled myself in pain
in hurt
in sorrow
in hate
i needed he's presence
i needed him.
until one day came.
where the sun was shining bright.
i came to school with the same broken eyes i had.
i walked to my left to get my books
as i caught my gem holding another gem of he's
i saw he's eyes.
it was no longer hurt;
it was bright.
it was yet, shining again.
it glimmered in life and hope
with he's face happy and content.
I stood there in sorrow;
feeling my legs wanting to fall and bump my head
my heart shattered in immense pain
as i saw my gem walked away
A tear fell from my cheek.
taking me back to the way that we meet.
all of my happiness was gone
when my lover,
my gem,
my darling
was yet
a flee.
