things change

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April 1996

*liams POV*

I hadn't been so ashamed of myself my whole life, how could i have missed it, my baby girl being born. Another reason i shouldnt have the life i do. What was i doing the night before? Sniffing coke, taking acid, drinking, all the things good patents dont do.

Im 24 years old and i couldnt believe my luck. Not only was i in the best band in the world but i was a father to the coolest little guy out there and the most beautiful baby girl ive ever layed eyes on. She was so like Sally. She had my hair and my eyes exactly the same as Lennons but everything else was her mum. Thats so amazing concidering i thought saying babys looked like there parents was stupid.

As i held Florance in my arms, feeding her while Sally got rest i felt something ive never felt before. It was madness how seeing her made me feel. Like she was the thing i should protect at all costs. Just like i felt the first time i seen Lennon.

"You got to stop looking at her like thag babe" Sally said. I smiled and looked into sallys eyes.

"All im doin' is looking at her" i said, knowing what she ment and just winding her up.

"Shes like you" she said smiling at me. I could see the pride in her eyes, i was proud of her aswell though.

"Im really sorry i wasnt here for it Sal, i tried" i said, i could feel my eyes start to fall. I was shattered.

"Come lay with me yeah." She said. I stood up and sat Flo in her bed.

I got in behind sally wrapping my hand around her tummy, it was still blooted and big, i inhaled her scent, i had missed it.

The thing was, i could have girls on tour and that but why? None of them made me feel like she did. Sure i fucked around, cheating didnt feel like cheating. I knew if she ever found out it would break her heart.

The best i could do was stay loyal, i had been for neerly 6 months now, i there was more than loosing her on the line now. Noel had it out with me about the amount im sniffing these days, concidering he had a few years before me he had a cheek. Hes been laying off since meg got pregnant but not on tour.

###

Home life was diffrent these days, since were off until we get back to the studio after Meg has her kid ive been trying to help sally out as much as i can. Its keeping me on my toes, Florence is a lot of work but im not complaining, shes close to perfect.

Sally was going through some shit and i didnt know how to help her. The docter gave it some name like baby blues or something, they said i just have to be there for her and im trying but looking after her and the baby and lennon is hard.

"Sally me mams here, d'you want to come down and see her?" I asked.

"Ill be down soon" she said, she was always tired and that. Me mam was always coming down to see Florance, she was only 2 weeks old and me mam travled down about 9 times in stead of just staying.

"Mam, fancy doing us a favour?" I asked her, she smiled.

"Whats up son?" She asked me,

"Would you mind staying tonight, Noel and Bonehead wanted me to go check out some song before we go into tge studio and that" i said handing the baby over to her.

"Course i will" she said.

"Might be a late one and i just want to make sure someone's here with Sally, shes still really tired and that" i said, i knew fine well i wasnt going to rehearse songs but the less they knew the better.

"What will be a late one," i hears Sally say, i turned and saw her. Even when she was sick, she looked amazing. Her ratty hair up in a pig tail and her night dress hanging baggy since her swollen belly has gone down. A stap of it hanging over her shoulder and my big Adidas zipper adound her even though that too is falling off her shoulders.

"I have to pop out tonight love, me mams going to stay and help you with the kids." I said feeling guilty for lying, Noel better have fucking told Meg to keep her mouth shut.

"Oh, how long will you be?" She asked.

"I might end up just staying at Boneheads. Noel said he had loads of shit for us to go over for during the summer too" i said. I could see her questioning me.

"Whatever" she sighed and stumbled in smiling at Flo in me mams arms as she sat on the big couch. I walked over too her and sat down beside her. She was something else. I pulled her into my side and kissed her forehead. She snuggled closser into my side and hugging me close.

"I love ya Sally yeah," i said. I knew she would have alarms ringing after me saying that but all i could do would be reassuring her that those 3 words were true. I had never loved anyone like i had our Sally, apart from the kids of course.

She broke my heart when she left, we were just kids and when i got her back i promised myself i would never let her go again and thats what im doing, every move i do behind her back it to save her from heartbreak because its something i need to do in order for me to make her happy.

I knew deep inside that doing this was the right thing to do. I had been planning it for ages but just waiting for the right moment and apparently Noels sick of me waiting  around too.

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