Good Morning Lilah

4.

4.

There's a new norm in town. Instead of just Raj and I with our green armchairs, I have finally accepted that Lilah Tov has officially joined the cast of characters on my Sunday mornings. She's safely out of reach, behind the counter, while Raj and I lounge in our plush thrones, absorbing the morning, one cup of tea at a time. This Sunday morning, I'm not at all surprised by Lilah's presence. She's there, and she's a distraction, but she's not a surprise. Far from it, actually. Now, Lilah is just another Sunday morning fixture, like the lamp behind Raj or our shared coffee table. It's inevitable that she'll be there, so there's no use in me wishing that she'd leave or that she never got the job in the first place. All I can do is accept her place in my Sunday morning and try to make my way through the business section of the Times.

"William," says Raj.

"Yes?" I respond, looking up from my newspaper (I have a subscription to the Times on my phone, too, but I've always preferred print—it's better for your eyes and far more pretentious).

"I was just wondering—how is Elizabeth?"

"Stressed."

"She's stressed?"

"Yes. Last I heard, she was very stressed, so she took an Addie."

"If she's stressed, why didn't she take a Xans?"

"Because she's stressed about her work, so the Addie helps her concentrate and get it done, thereby eliminating the source of her stress."

"Fascinating."

"But aside from abusing prescription drugs to cope with her insurmountable workload, she's doing fine."

"Is she?"

"I like to think so. She still has her mind set on government and always manages to make it to her barre class."

"How does she get her medicine, if you don't mind my asking?"

"Her dad's an anesthesiologist; he can get her anything she wants."

"Codeine?"

"Raj!"

"I'm asking for a friend."

"Yes, he can get her Codeine. She has a med card for marijuana, too, so there's also that."

"Does she deal?"

"Rarely. Her parents pay for her weed because it's medicinal, so she could make a profit off it—even though most people we know prefer coke—but she mostly just uses it for herself to cope or gives it to friends or loving boyfriends."

"So she's not your dealer?"

"No. Her stuff is great quality, but she's not the only one with a med card."

"Do you have one?"

"No, but my brother does for his 'anxiety disorder.' Do you have a card?"

"No, sadly, but I do have a dealer. His stuff isn't medical grade, however."

"Let me know if you if you ever want to switch over."

"I'll be sure to."

I nod my head, and then my phone rings. Like she knew we were talking about her, it's Ellie. I answer the call and greet her with a, "I'm inside. Hold on one sec, darling." Then I get up, grab my coat, and exit the coffee shop, sitting down on a metal bench outside. "Hey, El. What's up?"

"Will, I'm done," she says.

"You're done?"

"Yes."

"With what?"

"Everything."

"Done as in you've completed everything or you've given up entirely and accepted defeat out of frustration?"

"The former."

"Congrats, Ellie."

"Thanks."

"How'd you do that?"

"I pulled an all-nighter."

"Again?"

"It was worth it. Plus, Adderall is magic."

"Are you okay?"

"A little jittery, that's all."

"Go get some tea." I would offer for her to come here and get some tea, but I've never taken Ellie to this place. She could find it easily enough and for all I know she's been here on her own a million times, but when I'm here it's me time. I could bring her, but it would feel like the place was forever cast in an Ellie & Will shadow, instead of just Will, facing humanity on his own, one scone at a time. There are plenty of places for us to be Ellie & Will. This particular place, though, is not one of them.

"I think I'm going to go for a run instead—hopefully it'll tire me out."

"Just be careful. It's cold outside."

"It's only fifty, Will."

"Still."

"I'll be careful. We're still on for dinner tonight?"

"Wouldn't miss it."

"Great."

"Try to nap between now and then?"

"I'll try."

"Okay. Anything else?"

"Nope."

"I'm going to go back inside. I'll talk to you later."

"Love you."

"I love you."

"Bye, Will."

"Bye, Ellie."

I hang up and walk back into the coffee shop, unintentionally making eye contact with Lilah as I pass the counter. She winks at me. I look the other way and return to my seat. My newspaper and messenger bag are still there, soundly guarded by my trusty Sunday companion, Raj. I sit back down and resume my reading. If only the business section wasn't so boring...