356 days.
That's how long I have left.
6 months. 26 weeks. 4380 hours. 262800 minutes and 15768017 seconds.
Am I scared? Not really.
We're all gonna die at one point, some earlier than others and I just happened to me one of those people.
6 months may seem like a lot to the average person but truth is that no number is big enough to stop the tiny niggling feeling of how long is left eating away at you. Every hour that was going by was another hour I was losing. Every minute that was going by was another minute I was losing. Every second. Every breath. Every heartbeat. Everything.
After my visit with Dr Cadillac my day had mainly consisted of me lounging around and I could tell Mom was getting worried.
"182 days"
He stated regret and sadness evident in his voice.
"Are you sure" I asked in case there had been a slight error. Of course I was only kidding myself. I knew the reality of it but was too stubborn to accept it. Cadillac nodded solemnly. The certainty in that one gesture was slightly frightening. I look at Dr Cadillac blankly, face expressionless.
"Is there a slight chance I might...well make it?" I questioned, hopeful.
"Well if there is a chance it'll be very small" he said sadly, empathising 'if'.
I sigh and avoid eye contact.
"Evelyn..." he stated. I look up at him.
"As much as I hate saying this. I suggest you live your last 11 months to the fullest" he said.
"How so?" I asked.
"A bucket list" he began "make a list of everything you want to do and complete them. Doing it with someone will make it better and worthwhile." he finished. I snort at his response "with someone" who was I going to do it with? My mom? Addison? Obviously not.
I never really gave it a second thought after I left the clinic but now that I thought about it, it seemed appealing. I grabbed a piece of paper from my journal and labelled it and with that began.
Bucket list
Have my first kiss with someone I love...
(An// I'm going through some of my
Old work and it makes me so sad because I genuinely had so much passion for my writing and now it's just gone, it's sad as fuck :( I know a lot of people took a liking to this book when I originally published so I'm putting this out for you again, man 2017 feels like a lifetime ago)
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182 days | JMB
FanfictionEve has cancer and with only 6 months left she can't imagine too much fun coming out of it. And then she's forced to go to San Francisco. There was a lot of things she expected to come out of it: maybe a bit fun, probably some photographs and a cute...
