in which sakiya is struggling with the break from her first love, but slowly heals with the help of a boy in a leather jacket and a cancer stick-as she calls them-right between his perfect lips.
-lowercase intended
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I MISS YOU WHEN I SAY THAT, I MISS YOU MORE
moving on is harder than it seems. its hard when every waking moment you long for the one you need most, but he's in the arms of another. its hard knowing theres nothing you can do to change the past. but its even harder to accept. to remove the guilt and blame you've thrown on yourself because of it.
what could i have done better? was it my fault? what does she have, that i don't?
some questions aren't meant to be answered.
you just accept the fact, and fate decides. its not his fault that he doesn't love you back. but it isn't yours either that you do.
-
"sakiya go home now, you've been working too much. i can do the night shift for today" said the petite brunette from behind the register.
i give her a soft smile, while continuing to wipe down the countertops. "its okay jangmi i'm used to the late hours."
the faint sounds of page flipping and pencil on paper could be heard in the background from the hard at work customers.
she heaves a sigh before taking the damp towel from my hand and ripping my apron right off. "i'm serious, you need sleep, these hours aren't good for a college student like you." she shoved my backpack into my arms before pushing me outside the cafe.
"goodnight sakiya!" she yells while shooing me down the street.
i send her a wave and a smile before turning around to head home.
checking my phone it was 10:00pm. this was usual the time i left work, give or take a couple hours. i worked at a small cafe near my university. its a nice, simplistic coffee shop, and a common destination for students to study. our cafes hours were from 7am to 2am, perfect for scholars at all hours, wether they cram in late study sessions at night, or a daily fix and homework in the morning.
no matter what the time may be, i loved working there. the strong smell of coffee and constant sounds from the typing on keyboards were comforting to me. id rather spend all day there, over an hour at my quiet and lonely apartment.
there was only one flaw to working at a place so heavily crowded with acquaintances. and that flaw was him. in fact, he seems to be the flaw that affects most of what i do in my life. from taking a different route to school just to avoid him, or even stopping myself from enjoying a meal at my favorite restaurant to limit chances of being in the same perimeter as him.
