-Book one-
Before the Apocalypse, she was just Blake Holden. Before she was Blake Holden, she was Blake Spektor. That's when Daryl Dixon knew her, and she knew Daryl Dixon.
Of course, they had other names to refer to one another. Both hurtful and ki...
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It was moments until we managed to move, or rather I did. Leaving him in his truck to get my bike into the back bed, we still need to talk and I understand that. But what I don't understand is what in the world I was possibly thinking in going to that direction, it took me a minute. But once I had my hand connected to his, with my feet up on the dashboard in utter silence did it finally hit me.
I was trying to prove I was better than Julia, barely halfway home did I still get it. Especially when his eyes were burning to my side and I didn't say a word. "'m sorry. Really hope we work it out, Blake." That is when I smiled, his reasoning to it, or his understanding of my own expression as I tried to work through the situation had him speak up. And it wasn't the rotten tone I was given earlier when he was trying to explain everything, so in response did I hold onto his hand all the bit firmer, rubbing my thumb into his hold as I nodded.
Us returning to my house wasn't eventful, instead, I managed to get my bike cleaned and mostly taken apart to do a normal check of how much effort and love we need to put into these things to actually work.
I regretted losing control with him, but there wasn't a part of me that felt the courage to tell him that. My mind was just ticking for the moments for him to go home, the aloneness allowed me not only to get my homework done. But a general relaxing day off for tomorrow, whoever or why ever they chose to take the Tuesday off smack in the middle of the week, I will never know. Guess the students do need a daybreak, but it's more for the teachers considering it's called 'professional development day.'
Even when he left did I find myself still working on the bikes, again was it that consistency of trying to make myself better or distinct from Julia. A girl I never even met before, he's obviously attracted if he allowed it to get as far as it did. But he was so quick to blame it on a drug he shouldn't have taken, I made mistakes too. They were done with ease and didn't cause anyone else pain other than me.
The things I regret shouldn't be martyred by me being mad at Daryl, they should just be a reminder to not let my guard all the way down. And in this case was it a hundred percent my mission to keep it in the back of my mind. Even if that means releasing my anger at the last place I wish to cry.
