The Shadow Queen (A Rider novel)

Chapter Three: Dreadful Suspense

Pan's Point of View:

 It's very strange to have Kili with me while I'm flying on Kinjal.  I don't mind, but I've grown so used to flying by myself that it's a rather strange experience.

"You know, I don't think I'm ever going to get used to talking to you like this." I comment, peeking back at Kili.  He's still staring, wide eyed, at the passing landscape below us.  It causes me to smile as I turn back around.  

Seeing his expression reminds me of when I was first learning to fly, the unrestrained joy at it.

"How do you get anything done? I would just fly around all day." Kili says in wonder, and my smile grows larger.

"Well there's always been so many other things to do.  I lived on a very small farm with the rest of my family, so there was plenty of work there.  My father worked in the village as a smith, so that left the hunting to my elder brother and I.  I didn't mind it so much though; any chance to fly is worth it." 

He can't see since I am sitting in front of him, but my grin crumples a little as I say that.  I miss that life, more than anything. Valar, I haven't even seen Father or Rilin in so long, and Del, oh Del.  What am I going to do about her?  Surely it won't come to having to kill her, will it?

"You should stop blaming yourself for things that you cannot control, little one." Kinjal admonishes gently. "You cannot save everyone, though I know you give it your best."

I just keep staring ahead, not acknowledging Kinjal's words. Maybe she's right, but it doesn't do me much good.  My family is scattered to the winds at best, and at worst- I don't even want to think about the worst case scenario.

"She's right you know.  You're doing the best you can, I mean, you almost died saving everyone from the Balrogs." Kili's arms gently press around me in a hug before going back to gripping the spines along Kinjal's back. "We all believe in you, the only one left to convince is yourself."

 "Alright." I whisper out loud, even though I know neither Kili nor Kinjal will be able to hear it.

I don't understand how Kili does it, making me feel impossibly strong all the while understanding my weaknesses.  I do know, however, that I am eternally grateful for it.

The rest of the flight towards my old home is silent, though the absence of noise becomes more and more deafening the closer we get.  Anticipation and dread have knotted themselves together in my stomach, making it hard to think straight.

Nothing could have prepared any of us for what we see next though.  It is not an orc army that we will be fighting. No this is much, much worse.

***

I am so terribly sorry this chapter took so long to write. (And sorry it's rather short.) It was a mix of poorly-timed writer's block as well as several other events not having to do with Wattpad. It's finally posted though! Hurray!

Bit of a shocker coming up in the next chapter, so stay tuned! Please leave your thoughts and opinions in the comments below, and give it a vote if you think this chapter is worth it!

{Ship names, anyone?}

xx