13. ache

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~ sometimes the ache in the heart is so much, that it curbs the words.~

Everyone stood up in their places as they watched Nirmala take slow, baby steps towards the dining place. Ramnath stood up, his eyes showing rage. Had she come to snatch his son, the only anchor of his life from him? He looked at Suman, almost expecting her to have called her here, but Suman looked as much surprised as everyone else. Moreover, Nirmala's gaze was fixed at his own face, and none else. He moved out of the dining place and came to the main hall, decreasing the distance between them more. Every step that Nirmala took towards him, made a tear drop down her eyes, simultaneously making everyone else hold their breath in anticipation. She reached him soon and stood, looking him in the eye before slapping him hard on his left cheek. Preeti gasped audibly at the sound while Suman covered her mouth with her hands in shock. Nirmala didn't give even a second to Ram for a legitimate reaction and held the collars of his shirt, in her fists.

" Why Ram, why?", She shouted at him, before falling down on her knees. With trembling hands, she took out something from her handbag, making Ram dilate his eyes in surprise. It was his freaking diary. No one else could understand what was going on, but they were petrified to find the ruthless lawyer Ramnath Malhotra in tears. Ram sat down on his knees in front of Nirmala, though he could not muster the courage to touch her. Nirmala looked up with defeated eyes.

"Ten years Ram, ten years I had to spend away from you, from my Shravan, just because you could not have a balance between love and ego. Ten years, I lived with the guilt of loosing my family and with the thought that you hate me, and today I come to know that, no, you have loved me, always and till today. Just imagine Ram, we could have been together, as a happy family only if your insecurities didn't rule you. Shravan would have been a better person, not this bitter and shattered inside, just because of you. I can't even decide that should I detest you for ruining everything or should I embrace you?", Nirmala broke down again but this time Ram leaned forward to hold her, and cried heavily, but together for their mutual loss. Every other family member was in tears too, including Kamini chachi. Suman and Preeti came forward to wipe Nirmala's eyes while Pushkar and his elder brother Varun held Ram.

" Come back aunty. Whenever and wherever you start again, is a new beginning", Preeti spoke and Nirmala and Ram looked at each other.

" But after all these years, I can't leave Aditya too. And what he did, I know Suman and Shravan can't forgive her either", Nirmala again started crying fed up of the interlinked mess and chaos their lives had become.

"Maa!", She turned to find Aditya standing, with head lowered as he tried to avoid any eye contact with others, especially Suman.

"You have lived enough for us Maa, it's the time to live for your own. And don't worry about me, you will still be my maa. I will meet you often, wherever I will come down to Delhi or you can come to Mumbai maa. Staying together do not make a relation. I am your son and you are my mother, always. But at present, I want you to choose the son, you have craved to love since the last ten years", Aditya sat beside Nirmala holding her and resting his forehead on his mother's. Aditya had never been a bad person, it was the circumstances that had pushed him towards the evil side. Even Suman realized that and even though she knew she wouldn't be able to be friends with him again, she still decided to forgive him.

" Aditya", Suman called as aditya was about to get up and exit, " I forgive you", her voice was determined.

Aditya turned to give her a small smile of gratittude, before leaving Malhotra Mansion. Nirmala stood up and so did Ram, and after an exchange of an awkward glance, he embraced her, kissing her forehead as everyone else clapped with tears of joy.

" Shravan would have been so happy to see this", Preeti mumbled catching Suman's attention. And with that the thoughts of going to him ASAP rushed back.

" Preeti, I need to go to Shravan", Suman looked at her sister who gave her a helpless look.

"You can not go Di. Not now", Preeti looked down enraging Suman.

" Why the hell not?", Suman hissed. Every passing minute was getting on her nerves.

"Di, Amsterdam flights had been booked!", Preeti answered and Suman was confused. Why did she need to go Amsterdam now?

" But Nirmala, how did this diary reached you?", One question from Ram and everybody had their attention pinned to it.

" It came in the daily post yesterday.", Nirmala shrugged confusing Ram but the tube light of Suman's head had finally lit.

"Its Shravan", she spoke aloud, and everybody turned to her.

"And it's him who want to send me amsterdam right Pushkar?", Suman turned towards Pushkar who finally relived that Suman had understood, nodded.

" But how did Shravan get this diary? And why did he post it? He didn't talk to me about it either", Ram questioned again but Suman was lost.

The last two weeks of the pain filled orbs, his silence, his illness, his running away to Chandigarh, that wretched song on loop, the raw would on his hand, everything made sense to her now.

And somewhere she could also understand what was happening. The offers to PCT, her mamiji's apology, Nirmala's return, her trip to Amsterdam- she was now getting a clearer picture of the recent events. Without answering ramnath, she called up Tiwari Killa, waiting for her mamiji to pick up the phone.

" Mamiji, why did you suddenly asked for my apology?", Suman questioned as soon as she heard a hello from mamiji. She didn't have anytime for any formality right now.

" Shravan came to me that morning Suman beta, and he explained me how my behaviour had hurt you. Somewhere I always knew that, but hearing it from me made me realize how wrong I was. And so-", Suman didn't even wait to hear the complete explanations. She was already hyperventilating.

She then called her client, the first big tendor she had got.

"Good morning Mr Sinha. This is Suman from PCT. Actually I wanted to inquire about how you got to know about my PCT?", Suman asked formally, even though she was desperate to hear the answer.

"Good morning Suman. And to answer you, actaully we went to Malhotra and associates for a conference, and tasted your food there. And then Mr Shravan told me about you, so-", Suman cut him off before ge could continue.

" Thank you Mr Sinha. Have a good day", she instantly hung up.

" So Preeti, that question to me, about what would have I done if not married was also on Shravan's insistence, I suppose", Suman raised an eyebrow, and Preeti nodded meekly.

"And even this sudden plan of Amsterdam was also his idea?", She turned towards Pushkar, who agreed.

" Shravan had come to me a few days before di, and asked me to ask you that question. He told me he knows you are not happy with this marrige, or him, and also that he had given you only pain. I lashed out at him and insulted him too but he kept mum, just promising me that he will bring back all your happiness if I help him by asking you this question. I desperately wanted your happiness di, and so I agreed", Preeti confessed taking everyone else except Pushkar by surprise.

" And I suppose your reasons would also be more or less same?", Suman asked Pushkar who nodded.

" What the hell is happening here?", Ramnath who was a silent spectator asked furiously and Suman turned towards him.

" Congratulations Ram uncle. We have finally lost Shravan, to our ego, to our prejudices, and to our selfish happiness", Suman had tears in her eyes.

"Only if you guys would have understood that Suman can never be happy without Shravan, he wouldn't have been able to run away", Suman then turned to address Preeti and Pushkar, who in their quench to make Suman happy, had not noticed the screaming ache in Shravan's eyes.

"Book me a flight to Chandigarh ASAP", Suman sighed and looked at Pushkar who immediately set to work.

"Shravan Malhotra, be ready to face Sumo", Suman mumbled as she ignored everyone and moved up to her room, her heart painfully now aware of the condition he would be in. Her heart went out to him. He had always suffered in silence, and now, it was time, to bring him his share of happiness!

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