A Confession Of Heart

Chapter Six

"SAMMY!" I yelled loudly over the trains and buses near by. Her head turned to face me but she looked away. I didn't want to think the worst but it was impossible to clear my head. I couldn't think, I felt like I was slipping. Suddenly, she turned her head and smile. My mind was clear again...

We walked around, and I just couldn't think of something to say. Finally, we arrived at the library. Smiles return to our faces as we greet Sammy's friend. Conversation begins and it's almost like previous tension was broken. I was way off.

After lots of persuasion by Sammy, she got her friend to come with us to the park by her house. Of course, this was with a lot of negotiation. Especially since we wanted to go to a better park to play hide and seek. Doesn't mean we're not going to. Just it won't be as fun as it could have been.

It starts off fine, we play hide and seek, like normal. Headphones blasting like theirs no tomorrow, I could pick up a couple lines from a few of the songs...

"All along I believed I would find you...time has brought your heart to me..."

"2 am where do I begin? Crying off my face again..."

"A lesson learned is easier said then done...when you're living in a world without to sun..."

Of course, I'm easily spotted by Sammy and her friend. We take turns for a while until I realize the game has stopped. Looking around for Sammy and her friend, I find them sitting on a bench with a phone in between them. In two seconds I realized Sammy's phone had broken. I didn't even bother asking, what was the point? Not like she would give me a straight answer if I tried...

We split ways , all going "home." Well for them, it was home. For me, it was more of taking care of myself, which of course I don't mind. I held tightly to the necklace. Tears followed, remembering just all the events that occurred up until now. How did I get to this point? God....if I had just listened to Sammy and tried to get help, would I still be here? I wish I could show her I was sorry but it's too late to apologise.

At last I can relax. My apartment is quite spacious so it's nice and conformable. The beady eyes of a blue monkey stare at me, watching for movement. I'd gotten this monkey from camp and it was a day, one of the few that I regretted. This was because I left Sammy to talk to her cousin. The conversation that day led to many future events I'd rather not include.

The sounds of whispers suddenly surrounded my head.

"GET OUT OF MY HEAD I CAN'T TAKE THIS AGAIN"

The voices begin to fade and the bear stands up

"Hi Julia. I know you miss the things you had and regret the things you lost. Listen, you can have everything back if you play this special game of hide n seek...Go out with Sammy, Vicky and Amelia to the biggest park you can find. You know where that is. Then start the game and hide away. If they're rules, ignore them. In order to win and be set free, you must kill every single person in the game. You'll be the winner and never ever will you suffer alone. Now that you've heard this message, you have 5 days to play or you are sent back. Understand?"

I nodded my head and a small mark on my arm began to grow. The symbol was a diamond with an F made from a snake in the middle. It's so late...I fall into a deep sleep.

Exhaustion took over again as I woke up at a solid 10 am. Today is Thrusday, which would mean eveyone is technically in school. This leaves me to 7 hours by myself. I hop online and begin some of my own work. At this point, I've tested out of 9th and 10th grade. It's almost a guarantee I'll have an opportunity at college. The one thing that always stuck s with me was Sammy. She cared so much about me and she wanted me to turn my life around...before I decided to take the easy way out and kill myself. I never knew how much I'd truly regret my suicide.

What did I do to help myself? Nothing. I didn't want help and I'd rather try to live with a terrible lie then with a minor truth. Their was no true solution to the situation I built but maybe I could make it clear. Certainly if I cleared my name I wouldn't feel so obligated to make more lies. Then again, people wouldn't forgive a liar. I wanted to believe that their was a better way out but their wasn't.

Breathing heavily and hands shaking, I typed my words. Slowly and carefully, so it made perfect sense what I was trying to say to the world. No more lies. They had to know I was alive. Because if they don't, I know it'll only get worse.

The moment before hitting summit I realized something major. There is no turning back. I can't take this back and more especially I can't lie. I need to show the person I truly was before I decided to be a coward and give in to depression. It doesn't matter now if people could even believe I came back to life. The question is going to be why didn't I speak up? Why did I wait?

Tears clearing from my eyes, I hit send. I couldn't predict whether it was five minutes or two hours...but millions of people where reacting. Barely anyone against me, and almost everyone supporting my decision. Except when two F.B.I agents busted down my door and took me away.

"LET ME GO!" I yelled.

They carried me without even bothering to acknowledge me. A shot came to my neck and I fell limp in their arms.