Shatter Me

01: Still

His blood was boiling when he heard his name from across the hall. Hurt spilling throughout his chest like a heavy weight being put on his chest. Hearing him say his name was like swallowing a bitter pill. He couldn't even look at him let alone what to face him. How the hell could he do what he did and have the decency to even come and try to apologize.

The funny thing is he and Micah had warned him about her but he didn't listen to them. He had ignored what everybody had said and still went out with her. She had been wild and wreckless and he had liked that about her. She didn't care about what others had thought about her and Sawyer had found that interesting. He loved her and people warned him about her and what she had been known for but he didn't listen and a part of him wish he had.

He should have listened.

"Sawyer," Caden whispers, "Please. I need you to understand. I just... need to explain what happened. It meant nothing. You gotta believe me."

He could feel the eyes of some of the other students watching the two old friends in the middle of the busy hallway. The heavy scent of lemon cleaner and cheap perfume filling the hallway. Lockers slamming shut as students of Townsen High make their way towards the first class of the day, glancing occasionally over at the two boy as they began to gossip about the aftermath of Friday nights party at Stillwater beach. Sawyer shut his locker door, his brown eye staring at the chipping light blue paint on his locker door. Showing the true age of the school. Adjusting his backpack strap across his shoulder.

Caden takes a step closer, watching as Sawyer's jaw clenches tight. It's been two days since the incident at the beach and Caden wants so badly to go back that night and changed what happened between Zoe and him but he can't. They had both been drunk out of their minds, both getting into huge fights with their significant other. It just happened so fast. One minute they had been talking and the next thing they were kissing. One thing had led to another and then Sawyer and Addy had found them.

The look of pure hurt and betrayal across their face was still echoing in his mind. Watching as Addy stormed off towards the party, tears and mascara running down her tan cheeks as she ran off. Watching Sawyer storm off after Addy, Zoe following after the two of them. The sound of the rap music rattling throughout the large forest trees.

After a moment of silence Sawyer finally faces him. His shoulders going firm as he stares at the sandy blonde haired boy. Shaking his head as anger floods his mind. His fingers closing into a fist. He wants to hit something. Needs to hit.

He would love to give Caden a few good licks with his fist but Coach Atwood would have his ass on a silver platter if he found out about the fight. They were the captains of the varsity baseball team, they were the leaders. And Coach Atwood expected them to act like it.

"I'm sorry," Caden repeats again, the first period warning bell screetching throughout the hallway. Letting the students know it was now time to head to class.

"You're sorry? Sorry doesn't cut it Caden." Sawyer replies bitterly, ramming his shoulder and his backpack into the shorter boy and heading towards first period.

"What the hell are you all staring at?" Caden shouts, glaring at some of the students who had just witness the two friends fight. Ex friends. After a long pause he walks in the opposite direction of Sawyer.

+

Sawyer takes his seat in the back away from the other students, feeling their eyes still on him as they begin to gossip about Friday's party. He'd wish he could just stay home and stay away from all the drama but the drama at home is just as bad if not worse then what people at school have been saying. It's been a couple of months since his mom had left him and his dad. Putting them in a tight spot with money. They weren't poor but they weren't rich either. And since dads salary as a middle school teacher wasn't all that great mom has to give dad a couple thousand a month since she's a surgeon at Mercy Hospital.

"Hey," Micah says, stopping at the empty desk next to him. "Mind if I sit?"

Sawyer nods, and Micah gives him a small smile before taking a seat next to him. Setting his backpack next to his feet as he sets his World History textbook onto his desk. Glancing around the loud classroom before his brown eyes meet Sawyer's. "I know you probably tired of hearing this. But I am sorry Sawyer. And I know you probably think that I would try and defend Caden since he's my oldest friend but what happened Friday night is inexcusable. And I am truly sorry."

"I should have known." Sawyer whispers, leaning into his desk. "I mean... you warned me about her last year and I should have listened to you. But I didn't. I just had to have her. I didn't care about who'd she had been with I just..."

"Sawyer," Micah replies as an older man with in a blue button up and black slacks and peppered grey hair walks into the room. Quieting down the class as he begins to set down his things. Students begin to take their respectful seats as a brunette hair girl comes walking through the classroom. "You didn't know this was going to happen."

Sawyer's heart dropping in his stomach as he watches her. Pain piercing his heart, like a million different daggers were being thrown at him as he catches her eyes. Her dark blue eyes were filled with guilt and sorrow as she did everything to not meet his gaze. She scurries over to empty desk in the first row, avoiding everybody's gaze including his.

His heart was breaking. He loved her. He still loves her.

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