these darkened stars {andy biersack}

chapter eighteen

part one

oh, god. what had she been thinking?

her thoughts were silenced by a familiar, uncontrollable fear spiking in her veins and suddenly she felt like a deer in the headlights, trapped in suspension between life and death, frozen; there was nothing to be done about it.

all she could do was stare horrifyingly into a pair of familiar eyes.

-

alex and the other five males she was with piled into the band's van, their equipment and instruments packed tightly into the back so they could all fit. jake took the driver's seat, jinxx next to them.

the two had been walking closer to each other than to the rest of the group, which suggested they had the closer relationship of them all. they spoke quietly, their conversation falling on deaf ears.

cc and ashley slid into the middle, motioning for her and andy to join them. andy, not wanting him or alex to be alone in a seat, slid into the back after her, earning a shrug from the brunet who closed the door after them.

"where are we going today, boys?" cc asked to the two up front, nonchalantly throwing his right arm over the back of the seat.

"the pit."

"oh," he nodded. the van fell silent after that. andy, feeling uncomfortable and awkward with the silence, spoke up.

"i'm guessing you guys go out often?"

jinxx shook his head back at him. "only cc and ashley, they like to go bar hopping a few nights a week to get shit-faced and hook up with women."

"and men," ashley added with emphasis, glancing pointedly at him before looking at andy. "everyone i know calls me a ladies man. in reality, i like chicks and dicks, most fuckers just don't know."

"i get that," alex piped in, "though i prefer dicks over chicks, but people don't know, either."

andy jerked his head back like she had just slapped him in the face, confusion and shock both hitting him at once.

"wait, what?"

cc let out a loud whistle. "dude," he chuckled at her, "you are about to be in some deep shit."

"what's that supposed to mean?"

"wait," andy said again, unable to wrap his head around the confession she had turned into a casual comment like it had been nothing; he shifted in his seat so that his right leg was propped up and his body was facing her. "you're bisexual?"

"no," she countered, "i'm not bisexual."

his head jerked back again and now he was so damn, utterly confused that, when he tried speaking, all that came out was stuttering gibberish nobody could interpret properly.

taking a step back into his mind, he stayed there for a moment, allowing himself to think without outside disruptions. despite the fact that he could still feel the tightening, awkward atmosphere of the van, he was alone here.

if alex wasn't bisexual, did that make her... gay? the thought sent him into a small panic because oh god, i like her, i can't like someone who's not even attracted to my gender. what the fuck was i thinking? not good not good not good—

until he remembered that oh, she had just said she liked both sexes. well, chicks and dicks, as she put it. so that meant she could still be attracted to him, and he could still be attracted to her.