I Can't Recall the Last Time I Opened My Eyes and Saw the World as Beautiful.

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Dear Anthony,

I'm sorry i left without saying a word to you. You and me bother know this was going to happen eventually. I wish I could say goodbye to you in person, but I couldn't bare to see you mad or disappointed in me.

It just became to the point that I couldn't remember, or recall the last time I opened my eyes and saw the world around me as beautiful. It was all just a terrible wasteland where I felt locked up inside a cage, in need of some sort of escape.

I hope you can one day forgive me for leaving everything behind.

Wish you a wonderful life,

I love you.


Sincerely,

Your little brother.


~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~


It wasn't easy leaving. I know there were a lot of people who have left their past, in hope of everything getting better, but instead was faced with overpowering depression. And to be honest, the thought of that completely scared the fuck out of me.

Since leaving, I tried to put all my efforts into being a more positive person. No more moping around, no more running for someone for comfort. I can't coward away like I used to do. No, not anymore. 

Before moving here, I had made sure to apply to anyplace that I could in order to make some kind of money. I did save, but the money I have pushed aside, isn't always going to be here forever. And lets face it, it would be even more depressing to think I'm out, once and for all, to just go running back like a little wimp cause I couldn't afford to.

I had almost given up hope in coming here cause I haven't heard from any job opportunities that I had applied for. This place is so peaceful, so quiet, that the thought of going elsewhere made me want to give up on the idea of ever getting out of that place. Thankfully for me, I finally got a call back. I was then hired at a pet store. I know I'm no expert in reptiles and rodents, but I have my fair share of knowledge. 

As for living quarters, a studio apartment will just do. Especially when I don't necessarily own much since I sold most of them, and ditched the rest. The only think I really brought with me was just a couple of clothing items that I couldn't part with, and of course my savings.

Even if the size, isn't quite the idea of my old self, I'm trying to be as optimistic as possible. You know, the whole sending out good vibes, will lead to you getting it back in return, type of thing. And one thing that comes with this place, is the scenery. I'm completely surrounded by the woods, I'm a giant sucker for an amazing scenery.

And to top it all, there's this trail that leads straight down to an even more amazing, ocean view. People would probably kill for a view like this. They spend thousands upon thousands just to be able to see something like this. And there it is, right next to a tiny cost of a studio apartment and honestly, I couldn't ask for it any other ways.

This time when I open my eyes, I can finally say, all that I see is beautiful.

~ ~ ~


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