Always Is Not Forever (Breaking Myself - Part II)

19. The One Where I am the Unwanted Daughter

[ A L I N A ' S P O V ]

Someone knocked on my door-my new room door. Stopping the brushing of my hair, I opened the door to find Misha staring nervously at me.

Stepping back, I let her enter the room.

"Do you need something?" I asked her. "Shouldn't you be getting ready?"

"Alina." She caught my hand and made me sit on the bed. "Don't think bad, but I need a favor from you."

"Okay," I drawled out at her strange behavior.

She was supposed to get ready to meet her boyfriend's parents who were coming today to our house to ask for her hand.

I was supposed to get ready too.

"Bijoy's parents are orthodox. Please don't think it's something I want, but can you cover your arms?" Automatically, my gaze fell on my hands or the white scars standing prominently in the bright light of the day. "Please, Bijoy is very important for me. His parents won't get ready for the marriage if they see my little sister is suicidal."

Was suicidal.

"I talked with mama, she's ready to hide your past as well. You know how some people consider it as a shame." I nodded tightly. "They think it's not good for their family to engage with a family where the girl is assaulted. Don't mind but it's a bad thing for our family. A shame." But what was my mistake? "Will you do it? Please."

"But Misha, it's too hot outside. You know Delhi summer," I tried to reason out.

"Just for some hours. You've done it before."

Because I was habitual to it. How could I do something I hadn't done in a long time? I remembered how in starting, my skin would sweat too much and there would be rashes on my arms and my scars would burn as if I had dropped acid on it.

I stared at her begging face and nodded. If it could get her happiness, then it was fine. It wasn't like I was going to lay my past in front of her future in-laws and hear more things than I already did.

"Thank you." She stood up, passed her hand through her hair. "I will tell mama you agreed, and dress well."

"What if I hadn't agreed?"

"Nothing," She replied instantly. "Mama just said we'll hide I have a sister from them. Bijoy also thought it would be good if you were hidden for a while. Yes, he knows about you."

"Oh." It punched hard, too damn hard. "Did papa say the same?" She nodded tightly. "I see." Why was I in Delhi in the first place? If they didn't mind hiding me, I shouldn't have come back only.

Bangalore.

Not even a week had passed and I wanted to flee to Bangalore. I was free there, no restrictions, no shame, no judgments. Just me and Kabir.

I frowned. He never said me to hide my scars, no matter where we go, he never felt ashamed of them.

These were battle scars.

Or was I wrong?

What if they were a shame I carried on my arms, conveying what had happened to me? They were the constant reminders of what I had done, of what had happened to me, and rather than hate, I had started loving them. They were part of me. They made me who was I today.

"What if you say I'm in Bangalore?"

"I can't." Annoyance flickered in her face. "It's just for one time. He's what Kabir is to you." But Kabir would never ask me to hide my scars even if I was with his family.