Minho and Newt imagines

Newt Imagine 1

Right, left, left, right, left. You say the directions in your head as you turn through the maze, headed back to the glade with time to spare. You moved a lot faster today without a handsome distraction running beside you.

Newt, your running partner is off sick today, so you have a pleasant day to yourself, though you do miss him. Without Newt, you don't know how you would ever survive this place. He's the light of your day, and the best thing that's ever happened to you. He's the glue that holds you, and everyone else together.

You keep running, excited to get back to Newt and see how his day went. You think of what you two might talk about when you get back. Hopefully you can sneak a few kisses on him too, even if he does claim he is sick.

Then, as you're running you hear something ahead of you, to the left. You think it must be another runner, but according to the plans made this morning, no one should be on that path right now. You decide to check it out with only a hint of hesitation before turning the corner.

Then, what you see next is so out of place you don't understand. Newt is sitting there, leaning against the wall, his head hidden in his arms as his legs are pulled close to his chest. You walk a step closer and now you see his whole body convulsing and hear small whimpers escape. You walk one step even closer, and he looks up at you. You see his sorrowful, tear stained face, and immediately feel sorry for him.

"Hello there, love," he says, trying to pull a smile for you even though it's obvious he's not okay. "Newt...." you trail off into sympathy and you don't even know what's wrong. You sit down next to him, your bodies rubbing against each other, and he leans his head on your shoulder. You sit there like that for a little bit and allow him to cry.

"I guess I should tell you what I was doing here, Y/N." Newt lifts up his head and holds your hand for reassurance and squeezes. "I was gonna jump right off these bloody walls. Was going to end it all, right here."

~Oddly, this situation can be compared to a bottle of glue. If not closed properly after used, the glue dries out. ~

At first, only the top layers dry out. And then, once you peel off those layers (normally by the cap of the bottle,) there is more glue underneath, in the rest of the container. Underneath the dried layers, the rest of the bottle can still stick and function fairly well.

But recently, as Newt kept peeling his problems away, he couldn't function anymore. It hurt too much. Peeling the layers damaged him, and soon enough, Newt's bottle of glue ran out. Now he feels like a useless, sad, dried up glue bottle/person. He hid underneath all of the dried up layers and problems. And he hid very well. So well, no one ever found him until now.

You can't even imagine what Newt was going through. You didn't realize that he felt this way. Then again, no one ever seems to when things like this happen. Newt seemed so fine on the surface, but deep down he was far from it.

A few more tears escape from his eyes along with a few of your own. "Oh Newt..."

"I climbed half way up, then climbed right back down when I heard you coming. I hate this place Y/N." Newt said in a soft and unsteady voice. He then says in a louder voice shouting  to the creators, "I hate you WICKED!" Hate. A very strong concept, that can make you do very dangerous things. He yells one more time with growing anger, "I hate you!"

Once again, you feel terrible. "Newt, I love you with all of my heart, and I don't ever want to loose you."
Newt nods his head and lowers his voice. "I realize that now. Sometimes it's just hard for me to remember that. I am always trying to hold everyone else together, sometimes I fall apart myself."

Newt now realizes, that he needs to stop peeling the layers of problems away, and simply start closing the cap to the glue bottle. This way, it doesn't dry out. Sure there are issues every now and then, but issues he can handle.

Once the cap is closed, his problems don't just go away. That's not reality. His problems can't simply disappear. He can't just brush them off anymore. Once the cap is closed, he can take in his problems and deal with them, instead of pushing them away and peeling them off, to go help other people.

He now understands that sometimes he will have to save himself, before he tries to save everyone else.

Everything is quiet for a while. But Newt's voice interrupts the silence with a new certainty to his voice. " Y/N, I'm glad you found me." He pauses. "I'm glad I didn't jump off these walls. I'm bloody glad that I'm still here and alive."

He looks up at you and stares right into your eyes, "Y/N I love you and I won't ever do anything like this again."
"You know Newt, somehow, at least right here, right now, we are gonna be okay, even if we are trapped in this hellhole."

Newt wraps his arm around you and kisses you on your sweet spot on the neck gently, but at the same time, with passion. Everything really will be okay. "Thank you, love."