My first crush (COMPLETED)√

PART 2: Chapter 61: Broken heart

I saw his diary.

I never knew Stephen had a diary. I want to read it. I want to know everything about him. At least i'm his girlfriend. "No". I shook my head. It's not right but who cares? I took it back and sat on the bed reading it.

Stephen's diary

March 10 2007

Dear diary, it's hard to put this down because it hurts. It hurt me a lot. This is the worst day in my life. I killed my younger brother, Nathan. I swear, i didn't mean to. It was a mistake. We got into a fight. . I swear,i didn't mean to. I mistakenly pushed him down the stairs. I didn't know what to do. I was really scared. I quickly called my parents but they were too slow to pick up but when they eventually did, he lost his breath. My parents hate me. They all blamed me. I really wish i was in his position. I wish i was dead. The guilt is killing me. I don't think i can ever be the same.

********

I felt sorry for Stephen. To hold in this pain for too long.

September 19 2007

Dear diary,

I know it's been long. I just want you to know that i was betrothed to Patricia Scott today. She's pretty and i like her. I hope this relationship will be able to work.

*******

August 5 2014

Today was the first day some guys taught me how to smoke. It was also the first time i had sex. It was fun.

Note: If you're underage, don't ever try this. It's wrong.

August 6 2014

I had sex with Patricia. She was a virgin. I was the first guy to have sex with her. I was pretty hard on her.

**********

I gave different expression to every part i read. Yeah, i was jealous but there relationship is over so it didn't matter.

April 9 2017

Diary, I have done something bad this time again and i completely regret it. I swear. It happened today on my birthday. My friends and i were half drunk in my room. I brought up a stupid  game, whosoever comes in,especially a girl, we will have sex with her. A new student who got invited to my party, Jemma Spencer came in and we raped her. Unknown to us at first, she was a virgin. She was really weak because we all slept with her on several rounds. Seriously, i wasn't myself . What pained me the most was that she died as i was fucking her. I really wish i could turn back time and correct my mistakes. I wish she would forgive us.

******

"Oh my god! This can't be. It can't be Stephen. He can't be a murderer. He can't do this. No wonder i saw a poster of a missing girl in our school. No, i need to finish reading it."

AS i heard Stephen's footsteps, i quickly hid the book.

"Babe, i heard your voice outside. Is something wrong?" He asked as he came to bed.

"N...no,no, nothing."

"Okay, I'm going to sleep. You should get some rest and stop thinking about it. Good night." He planted a light kiss on my forehead.

I continued reading immediately he fell asleep.

September 16 2017

Dear diary, i met a pretty new student today and i can't get my fucking eyes off her. She's so beautiful to get your eyes off her. Stiles thinks i have gotten too slow on girls since i started dating Patricia but that's not true. I fuck as many as i want. Besides, they are the one that come begging for a taste of me but this girl, I'm going to get her between my legs. She's going to moan my fucking name. So, we made a bet that i must fuck her within a month since she's a virgin. I can tell by her innocent eyes but what is within her ain't innocent.

*******

My body froze in shock.

"Oh my god. Stephen," I cried between my words. I covered my mouth so he won't wake up.

"How could you? How did he know i was a virgin? All this time, I was being fooled."

He never loved me. He only had lust for me. I couldn't stand him. I took my car keys and left a note saying; "Don't ever look for me you bastard!"

I was driving on full speed. I thought of calling Bella before i did something crazy but she wasn't answering my calls.

"Answer the call Bella. Answer the damn call!"

I parked my car and took the bottle of alcohol next to me. I drank it to clear my head. I came out of the car and screamed.

"Fucking bastard! Aargh!"

I kept on drinking till i finished it. I called Aaron.

"Hello, Sharon."

"A---aron, Aaron. I don't know what to do anymore. My life is useless."

"What are you talking about? Why do you sound that way? Are you drunk?" He was confused.

"Does it matter? My whole life has been lies. I can't trust anyone. I can't take this anymore! I'd rather die. I don't know my purpose of living anymore. I thought i did."

"Sharon, Please tell me where you are right now. Don't do anything stupid."

"Why shouldn't i? Oh, yeah, Stupid. I was stupid at the first place. It's best if i die stupid, don't you think?"

"Please tell me where you are. Sharon please! I don't know what i will do if you leave me. Please tell me. I beg you."

"NO, i don't need saving. I've made up my mind. I just wanted to tell you goodbye."

"Sharon, please don't. If you do, i might do something stupid too. Just tell me where you are."

"I don't know."

"Describe."

"I'm on a bridge. It's still under construction."

"Just stay there. I'm coming to get you. Promise me you won't do anything crazy."

"I won't. Just come quick."

He hung up. He took his keys and drove on full speed.

Fifteen minutes passed and i haven't seen Aaron. I was losing patience. I couldn't wait anymore. It made me to think about how stupid i was to fall for Stephen. I couldn't take it anymore. I don't want to feel the pain. I  just want to be free. I'm better off dead.