In My Remains

Why do I have to see this through?

A/N: Ready for more angst and some drama? And one oops...  

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"It didn't work", Mike said when Rob answered the phone.

He was making the breakfast while Brad slept. Like the days before. It was already noon and his brains were screaming for coffee.

"He... We went to sleep and I did what you suggested. And then I woke up to him screaming. He had a nightmare. I think the man was back in the dream. When he woke up I wasn't there and he panicked. Rob he... It felt like my heart was being ripped apart! He was so scared and confused. Then asked why him. And I couldn't answer. Cause I still can't think any logical reason why him!", he yelled.

"Mike... Try to calm down okay. Then?", the drummer sighed. He could feel how desperate the half Asian was.

Mike sighed and sat down. He had to calm down, he knew it. "Then he asked why can't he remember it all. Which only makes me think what does he remember?"

"Yeah... But obviously cause you didn't call me then you managed handle the situation?", Rob asked.

Handle. What a nice word for it, Mike thought groaning inwardly.

"He calmed down eventually yes. Stopped shaking and crying. And then when I wondered stupidly out loud why he trusts me he said cause I love him", the half Asian said and glanced at the doorway that lead to the bedroom.

"What!?", it was Rob's turn to yell.

"Yup. I don't know why he said that and what does it mean but I sure as hell don't want to ask", Mike continued and got up to pour the coffee.

"For fuck's sake Mike... How the hell did you get yourself into this mess! Shit...", the drummer muttered.

"You think I don't know that? I want to scream and yell and run away. And same time I want to yell at him that I love him and that I would do anything for him. I hate this!", Mike groaned.

"What the hell do we do now... Does that mean he heard you then or... Don't... Okay, we'll do this. Don't talk to him about it. Let's get Elisa to pick him up", Rob said.

"I don't think that's a good idea", the half Asian mumbled.

"Mike! We have to do that. This isn't a good idea", the drummer raised his voice.

"Fine! I know it won't end well but let's do it anyway", Mike answered in same manner.

"This whole thing won't end well! You know that! Not if you two continue with what you're doing. He is a mess, you are a mess and you both cling to each other for different reasons. Someone is gonna get hurt and that will be you. I did tell you it already", Rob tried to explain.

"Yeah... Okay", Mike sighed.

"You know he will be fine. Even if you're not with him every single hour of the day. You still live close to each other and can visit when you want. Then you will be fine too", the drummer continued now calmer.

"I know you're right. But it hurts. It hurts so fucking much", the emcee whispered.

"Will do that today. I'll be there too", Rob said and closed the line.

Mike placed the phone back to the table and tried to push the thoughts aside. Groaning he got up and went to fetch the guitarist to eat something.

"Hey. I made breakfast. Come and eat?", Mike stroked Brad's arm gently.

Brad got up to sit and looked confused a second. Then he yawned and glanced at Mike before he stood up. Following Mike they got to the kitchen and as like any other day they ate in silence. Then they grabbed they coffee cups and sat in front of the TV. Brad was shivering slightly and Mike wrapped a fleece blanket around him.