My Way

Chapter 3

This was the perfect time for my invisibility skills to kick in.

Please God make me invisible.

Please God make me invisible.

Please God ma….

“Emma, honey is that you?”

I finally decided to open my eyes since the monster wasn’t going to leave and neither was I going to disappear.

  That was Sarah Louis. Ladies and gentleman, there’s only one word to describe this lady– a bitch. A very very mean bitch.

“Sarah” I tried to sound surprised and smile shyly at her, but what can I say, it was too hard to fake with this one.

“ Honey, I’ve missed you.. where have you been?”

I could see Paul trying to hold in his laughter, he wasn’t doing a good job though; he was starting to tear up. At least someone was enjoying this lovely meeting.

She looked at Paul with those mean fearful eyes ; he  immediately gulped his laughs and sat in silence.

I couldn’t help but smirk as I saw the look on his face.

 I decided it was time to talk before she tries to shoot him or something -“ umm.. I’m great, how’s everything working out with you.”

“Oh you know me, always great.”

Ofcourse, she had to rub in her perfect life in my face.

“How are you honey since the incident?”

Might I just add that she used her fingers as quotation marks when she said “the incident?”

I couldn’t help but glare at her for just bringing the topic up. I swear she takes pleasure in my misery.

I’m pretty sure I was giving her the “you’re dead to me look” by that point, but she just couldn’t shut up.

“Do you see him anymore? You know you can talk to me anytime.”

Paul looked at my “I’m about to crush her face expression” and jumped in.

“So, Sarah I heard you got married.”

“Aha, yes, darling to the most handsome man alive.”

I could see Paul rolling his eyes, there was no hope with this lady.

After that, I just stopped talking and listening and sat in silence, blocking out everything I hear. It was almost impossible to walk in this town without people bringing up the subject or eyeing me with those puppy dog eyes.

I excused myself early from dinner and walked out.

 My few hours of happiness were over.

Drving at 120km/hour. I knew I was faced with 2 choices- death or finally returning back home to my bestfriend- my bed.

There was a letter waiting for me on the doorstep. Weird, it had no name or address.

Part of me knew it was from him, but what could he possibly have to say for himself.

Dear Emma,

I don’t know how to apologize to you, there’s nothing in the world that would make things better again and I know that, but you must know I will always love you even when something like this tears us apart. I hope that one day you’ll find the strength in yourself to forgive me.

Love, your one and only

I couldn’t move, breathe or even blink.

APOLOGIZE!

FIND THE STRENGTH IN ME TO FORGIVE HIM!

LOVE ME!!!

YOUR ONE AND ONLYYYY !!!

Yep, I was starting to take in every word from the letter, AND I WAS ANGRY, NOT ANGRY… FURIOUS!

Human beings have this weird way with each other, to say things and do the exact opposite.

 Who in their right mind will put someone they love in such hell ? HAA ? WHO?

I hated him so much. every.single.bit.of.him.

I stood there for a second to calm down and finally decided to just head off to bed.

I quickly took off my clothes, tossed them to the ground and just laid there.

Well, that lasted for 2 seconds, and then I started to kick my feet from the rage occupying my heart.

My face had turned to a bloody tomato, so I decided it was time to stop kicking my harmless bed.

Looking at the glowing stars on my ceiling; I flashbacked to one of our best days,

 As he picked me up and ran like there was nothing weighing him down and jumped in the pool.

I was so angry at him for getting me and my clothes wet, but he had some kind of spell over me.

 He looked at me, as the sun shone on my face; and just said “I love you.”

And yes, that was his spell; his charm.

That was Ian, saying the perfect things at the perfect timing.

I always knew he had anger management issues but I never thought it’ll ever go that far.

I teared up as I remembered some snapshots from that night. How could someone I thought was that perfect turn out to be someone the complete opposite?

He was supposed to be my true love, the one that got my back all the time, but now he just left me scarred for life.

As I was falling asleep, I decided it was time to face my fear by finally talking to him.

Maybe, just maybe… I could get the answers I was looking for. The peace I needed to move on.

He couldn’t harm me anymore; he was locked up with those lukewarm chains. He was already tied up with scalding hell and shame.

He got what he deserved, but part of me just wanted to get him out of there and take him back home. That was the part I truly hated, the one that had no dignity and just blind love.

I didn't know that that part will fade quicker than I ever expected.