Love Has No Place here (tokyo ghoul x reader)

Gift

  The next week you stayed at home cleaning the poor boys books and looking into what hospital they took him to. As the days passed you found yourself conflicted.

    Rize is gone, it was your fault, but it was for the good of everyone. You hummed as you finished wrapping his books together with ribbon. Scarlet red ribbon that bound the three now clean or replaced books together.

    You wanted to go see him, but you were still concerned about Touka. She looked..... familiar. Like someone from yours and Rises past. But you couldn't quite pinpoint it. You shook your head. The knob jingled as you opened your front door and made your way out into the blistering sun. You threw your hood up in hopes to block the rays, but sadly failed. Instead you took to the alley ways. Its not like anyone would approach you anyway, you had a reputation in the alley ways and you actually preferred it that way.

  The hospital grew ever closer and your nerves were beginning to really weigh you down. What if he remembered you and was angry? What if he snitches on you? ......what if he's already reported you? You clenched your jaw and kept on walking. If you were reported it was your own fault. You were the one that agreed to stay with Rise so of course you should deal with the consequences.

  The door opened without a sound and the frosty hospital air made you shiver. You took down your hood and politely asked the lady at the front desk what room kaneki was in. She gave you a kind smile and told you the room number, you couldn't help but sigh in relief.

  She didn't seem suspicious. Maybe he didn't rat you out after all?

You tapped the elevator button and the quiet clacking of gears filled the box. You quietly hummed as the elevator came to a halt and opened. You stepped out, your shoes hit the floor but were silent. You arrived at his room and knocked. You heard a small 'come in' and gently opened the door. At the sight of you he froze. At the smell of him your gut wrenched.

   Rize

  Kaneki let out a small whimper, obviously afraid. You held up your hands despite the smell. The books still wrapped neatly in your bag suddenly weighed heavier.

   "Kaneki, please i-"

   "Are you here to finish me off?" His voice shook. You gave a sad smile and shook your head no.

   "I came to see how you were doing, and-" you reached into the bag and pulled out his books. "-to return these." You bowed. His eyes lit up a bit before he looked suspicious again. You sat them on the table. The silence that you usually enjoyed was tense this time. You decided to be the ice breaker.

  "Kaneki...I'm so sorry." You said. He looked up in curiosity. "Its my fault this happened I should have stopped her." You looked down in shame. "...but I just couldn't then..." Your voice broke. He looked at you sadly.

  "What's your name?" He asked.

  "...huh?" You looked up in surprise. He smiled.

  "Your name!" He said once more.

  ".....y/n." You said. He looked at you for a minute before smiling again.

  "Well y/n, I forgive you. I can't completely understand why you did it but...I can try and understand you had reasons." Your eyes stung but you quickly blinked away the tears. He laughed.

  "Please don't cry y/n, its not like you did this to me...it was her." He stated. You nodded amazed at how pure he was. Such a cinnamon roll.

  "May I sit down?" You asked, voice still wavering. He gave a small nod and you sat in the chair by his bed. The doctor walked in then. He asked who you were but before you could answer Kaneki answered for you.

  "She's a friend." He gave you a smile. Your heart swelled. The doctor asked if he'd be comfortable with you being in the room as he read the papers. Kaneki told him it was fine.

   Then the doctor began to explain how they gave him Rizes organs. You could feel the vomit in the back of your throat. Kaneki nodded along not knowing what was in store for him. His brows were furrowed but he just nodded along. But maybe it wasn't so bad? Maybe it wouldn't effect him?

  Its when they brought him food and he couldn't eat it that your stomach dropped. You looked at the floor. It had been a few hours since you came to visit him and surprisingly you and him got along well. And though you barely knew him, you couldn't just keep this to yourself. You placed a hand on his, a sincere motion, he blushed.

  "Kaneki... I have something really important to tell you." His eyes narrowed but he asked you to continue.

   "I don't mean to be blunt but....they gave you Rize's organs and...you can't eat...you're probably..." Your voice wavered. Fear struck his eyes once more and he gripped your hand tighter than what you were used to. Tighter than what he was probably used to also.  He broke down then. Not able to hold back the fear, the sadness, the shame. You almost broke down watching him, but you had to stay strong for his sake.

   "y/n....what do I do?" He sobbed. You glanced at him with sad eyes.

   "Kaneki, all I can do is offer you my help and assist you with whatever you need. But I'm not sure you'd want to be around me after everything." You said. He uncharacteristically pulled you towards him and gave you a bone crushing hug. You gasped, being touched deprived so long, you were stiff. Unable to ease into it.

   "Please help me...." He cried. You fought yourself and slowly but surely relaxed. You wrapped your arms around his torso and brought one arm up to run your fingers through his jet black hair.

    
      "I promise."