Hero

Chapter 11

Recap:

        "What a lovely mint green sweater you have on sweetie. It would be a shame if it were to get dirty. -Occidere."

        "He's targeting you."

Harry's POV

        Watching Sage intertwine her fingers with Zayn's makes me feel fragile--vulnerable even. The way her voice went from blaring sirens to a soothing waterfall. She was so different last night. It wasn't the good kind either. 

*Flashback to last night*

        "You're perfect to me." I whispered in a hoarse voice. I almost couldn't believe the words that were slipping out of my mouth. It just flew out without a warning. 

There she was staring. I don't know if she found it flattering or if she thinks just trying to get in her pants. Yeah, she's hot, but my mom didn't raise me to take advantage of girls.

"Yourmomdidn'traiseyou, idiot. Idid." Agravelyvoicetellsme.

My jaw tightens when I remember thememory.

"Just shut up!" I yell. I see her jump to my sudden remark and it makes me realize what I had just done.

"Shit," I whisper. "Sorry. It wasn't you I was talking to."

I try to search for the unspoken reply on her face since it was yet to be found on her lips, but she was blank. 

        "Get in her head, Harry." a sharp voice told me.

I snap back and ignore the thought. I made a promise to Sage and I intend on keeping that promise. I've broken too many. There's no way I'm gonna break one as simple as this. But was it really that simple?

        "Harry, this is totally irrational and illogical. If you think I'm looking for a relationship I'm not. I am flattered by your compliments, but I don't need to start something I can't finish nor do I actually want it."

        The words didn't hit me like flying bullets, but like a dagger. Slowly, painfully and tortuously. Once the dagger was all the way in pentrating every layer of skin I had, it was pulled out again the same way it came in. Slowly, painfully, and tortuously.

I'm appalled.

        I open my mouth to say something. I have no clue what I should say however I feel the need to say something. Something that could make her feel the spark between us. Yes, it is just a spark- a glimmer of hope, but isn't that how a wildfire starts? With just a spark? .

Her tired voice severs mine.

        "I would like to stay professional. It's the only way we can get the job done as quickly as possible, Harry. What made you think that I'd truly consider being with you? I don't mean to be harsh, but if you thought I was leading you on, I wasn't. I'm sorry."

        And that was that. She stared up at me one last time that night with her chocolate grass eyes and left her room to make herself a cup of coffee.

*End of Flashback*

        I  told her I liked her. Not directly, but it was so freaking obvious. I've tried so hard to not be a douche.

Ifonlyshemettherealyou.

'No' I think. That was the old me. Not the real me. I've changed.

She basically slapped everything I told her to my face. Her stares, filled with such beautiful confusion at Central, breakfast at Tiffany's, and wherever we were really almost made me certain she felt the same way. Almost. She was such a mystery yet to be solved.