Ivan stood his ground, alone in his room with Wang and a gun by his side. Wang glanced at Ivan, still pleading for him not to shoot.
But Ivan wouldn't listen to him.
Wang probably didn't even care for him. Why would someone care if he died? He was just another person on the planet.
People notice Matthew more than they notice him.
Katyusha was still with Natalya in the hospital, not daring to leave her sisters side.
Ivan looked down into Wang's eyes.
He saw the love in them, but he didn't sense it.
Ivan put the gun against his own stomach, hearing even more wails from Wang.
He only put it against his stomach because he knew deep down he couldn't put it to his head.
Ivan thought on about the satisfaction in Alfred's eyes when he'll know he's got what he has wanted. The satisfaction is what it was all for.
He imagined the hurt in his sisters eyes.
Tears streamed down his face as he looked back at Wang, who was crying as if The Calamity had just begun.
Ivan slowly looked down at the gun pointing to his stomach and tightened his grip.
Wang punched Ivan in the arm, demanding him to stop. His sobs came out more like whispers as he progressed.
Suddenly the gun dropped.
The trigger of the gun got jerked back, shooting in the direction of Ivan's stomach.
It pierced through him like a knife through pudding. Harsh yet gentle.
Ivan heard yelling and crying from Wang as he collapsed to the ground, bleeding.
He was gonna die.
Ivan smiled through the tears and pain. This is what he wanted.
"Your not going to die! Ivan, please don't die. Don't die don't die... "
Don't die. Don't die.
Those words crossed through Ivan's now slurred mind.
But dying is the only thing people wanted me to do. To die.
• • • I'm sorry • • •
Wang stared at the now bleeding Ivan. He couldn't die. Not right now.
Tears kept on coming, he couldn't stop crying. His only love was dying in his hands. He could of prevented it. He could of saved Ivan.
Then Wang looked over at the gun.
The gun that could kill someone in under a minute. The gun that shot Ivan.
Wang could easily kill himself as well.
YOU ARE READING
My Own Thoughts
FanfictionPoor Ivan has suffered from depression and bullying all his life. It wasn't anything new. But one day, something pushes him over the edge, making him commit to his thoughts. I wonder what happens I will post five chapters per every few days unt...
