The Hunted

Chapter 5- Lost

I fell on my knees and slowly lay down on the snow. I covered my mouth with my right hand, my only hand. Tears of agony flowed out of my eyes and I didn't get up for some minutes. I let the pain subside and then stood up. I covered my left arm, or what was left of it, tightly with a cloth.

I wiped away my tears and stood straight as if nothing had happened. I grabbed the dead wolf and dragged it to my cabin, where I cut it up, cooked and ate it. My hunger wasn't satisfied but it was enough to keep me alive. I drank some water that I got from melting the ice. I sat on the floor of the cabin and looked at the slight rays of sunlight fading out and giving way to darkness. Eventually, my tiredness made me fall asleep on the floor.

••••••••••

1 month later,

Another month passed by, I still didn't find a way or any food. I felt like I was losing my sanity as my weakened body demanded food. I didn't see the hunter for the whole month. I didn't see a living or moving thing for a month. I wanted to think that he had given up or better yet, died. Somehow the fear of him watching me was still present in my mind.

I looked at myself in a broken mirror in the bathroom of the cabin. My beard grew out and my hair was messed up. I wasn't even able to recognise myself. My face appeared broken in that mirror, maybe it was my sanity that was broken. My stomach rumbled for the tenth time that day. I desperately needed food.

Just like everyday, I went out to search for food even though I had given up hope. Maybe I wanted a miracle. I passed by a tent, there was a corpse of a man lying right outside it. The man seemed as if he was killed recently. I went closer to the corpse and inspected it. I found a compass, a broken flashlight and a blood-covered note.

I 'smelled' the corpse and my stomach rumbled. I was hungry. I quickly discarded the thought. How could I even think of it? It is inhumane. I was disgusted by my own thoughts. I went back to my cabin to get a hold of myself. I lay on the floor and held my head in my hands. The thoughts had scared me, I didn't want to do it.

For six more days, I didn't exit my cabin lest I'd have another thought like that. On the seventh day, I walked out of the cabin over to that body which was starting to rot.

I stood beside it and stared at it for a few minutes. It was as if I was not in control of myself at all. I kept my gaze on the body without an expression of even the slightest remorse.

I knelt down, dug my nails into its skin, tore its flesh and ate it.

Hunger overcame me, I wanted to stop but I couldn't. Everything that makes me human blurred away at that moment. I was nothing more than an animal, a hungry animal.

After I finished eating, I looked at myself. Blood covered my mouth, my hand and even my clothes. A wave of realisation struck me. I stood up and staggered back in shock. I leant against a tree with my hand and threw up everything I ate. I coughed and choked and vomited until I couldn't anymore. I cried at my actions, how disgusted I was because of them. I sat down with my back against the tree and cried silently. I wanted to cry out loud, I wanted to let all my emotions loose, but I couldn't.

After an hour or two, I dragged myself to my cabin. I slammed the door shut and started pounding at the wall, breaking everything and wailing.

Suddenly, I heard a gunshot. The window broke and a bullet came flying in through it.