Unthinkable

Chapter 1~ Changes

A/N

So I want to start off by saying that I don't own any of The Hunger Games characters even though I wish that I did😊

Enjoy:)

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I am immediately overwhelmed with guilt once I let go of Peeta's hand. If only I could've lied about every kiss we had being for the cameras . . . Why didn't I? I stare at Peeta intently, regretfully as he trots off. It is only when cameras surround me that I snap back to reality. I realize that my authentic smile has melted into a saddened expression. I suppose maybe I could pretend this is because Peeta has left me to greet his family, but I have to regain the smile either way.

I don't want to act anymore. I have hurt someone who has done nothing but good things for me and it is acting which has caused it. I don't wanna see another camera. All I can think is- as much as I owe Peeta, this is how he's repaid? I shove my way through an enormous wave of paparazzi. They scowl at me, but continue to follow my every last move. I step on toes and ram into unfamiliar faces before reaching who I wanna see.

"Katniss!" her familiar high pitched voice squeals. I run to Prim and desperately embrace her petite figure. We are unable to say much. What little things we utter are overridden by the loud, obnoxious cheers of the crowd. People continuously tug at my arms, seeking my attention. I manage to wriggle my way out of their grasp and push on through more of the crowd before another person pulls at me.

"Quit!" I demand agitatedly. The person grips my hand another time and I spin around to see that it isn't paparazzi. I know the striking dark hair and fierce grey eyes anywhere. He pulls at me one last time to bring me in an embrace. I don't refuse this time. I allow him to tug my arm until my body is pressed against his. My arms wrap around his waist and I stand on my tiptoes to lay my head against his shoulder and press my face into his neck.

"You can't leave me again, you got that?" he asks, giving me a tighter squeeze. I moan into his neck and then pull my head back to look at him. I examine his face briefly before replying.

"You're right, I can't. I would never be able to," I tell him factually. He tucks a loose strand of my hair falling from my braid behind my ear and manages a smile. Knowing him for so long, it is easy to tell that this smile is faux. "Let's get Prim and the rest," I say and begin snapping my head in all directions in hopes of finding them this easily. "I wanna get home."

A portion of the crowd has vanished and it is only a little easier to spot Gale and I's families. I share short hugs with Hazel and the kids before we all manage to escape the paparazzi swarming me. After walking for awhile, I stop in front of a little old torn up house- my house. Everyone stops and I continue on to the door and spot a small envelope placed on the ground with Katniss Everdeen written in small lettering along the front. I retrieve the mail and open it to find a small key and a slip of paper with an address on it concealed inside. I turn to face the group and reveal what I have gotten and they all nod.

Hazel and the kids branch off to their home and I force Gale to stay with me. I hand my mother the key which makes her smile a little bit. Maybe it's because even something as simple as allowing her to turn a lock and open the door has meaning to it since I hadn't let her touch anything addressed to me in the past after my father died. It is the closest I've gotten to letting her do something for me that is motherly in years.

Prim oddly doesn't seem quite as lively today. Has watching me compete in the games taken a toll on her? Maybe it's just because it's all still fresh in her mind. It'll fade off, I tell myself, though this doesn't help my concern. I wrap an arm around her shoulder finding that I don't have to lean down as much to do this. Prim has grown taller since I've been gone. She glances at me and I can't help but notice how it seems her face has even matured. Now not even her personality is quite the same and I'm not sure if I can handle all of this sudden change.