Fire and Ice Book 2 (Loki X Reader)

Brotherly Love

The following week Loki's state didn't get any better. He was like a shadow of his old self as he sank deeper into depression. He barely left his room anymore and he totally neglected himself. He didn't eat, he was wearing the same clothes for god only knew how long and he often found peace in the company of a bottle of anything strong.

The Avengers couldn't watch him suffer anymore and decided that they need to take action and help him somehow. At first, they wanted to get him a therapist, but they realised Loki would rather die than talk to a mere mortal about his feelings. The only person he ever opened up to was you. And since your disappearance, he was keeping all his pain and sorrow to himself, but it became too much for him to handle. He acted like the others didn't care about you at all, or like they couldn't understand how he misses you. Finally, Thor came up with the idea to take his brother to Asgard, where he wouldn't be surrounded by your things and memories. Maybe a little distance would be good for him. Also, he could continue his research in the library of the palace since he had read all the books in Stark's library.

When Thor entered the room, Loki was lying on the floor, fidgeting with a small box in his hand. His face was hollow and pale, his eyes were blank as he was staring at the ceiling. His tangled, black hair was now below shoulder-length.

"Brother, can I talk to you?" When Loki noticed Thor's presence, he stopped playing with the small box and sat up. He looked surprisingly sane as he lifted his gaze upon his brother.

"It was my fault," he said rather to himself than to Thor. He sat next Loki and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Why do you keep telling that? It was not your fault. You weren't even in Midgard when it happened," he tried to comfort Loki.

"That's the problem. I should have been here. I could have protected her. But instead, I was in Asgard searching for this," he lifted up the mysterious box in his hand with a pained smile. Thor took it from him, and carefully opened it up. His eyes grew wide in surprise as he saw what was inside.

"Is it..."

"Mother's ring, yes. She gave it to me some years ago, because she hoped to see it one day on the hand of the lady I want to live my life with. Sadly, she didn't live long enough to meet her, and now I'm not sure if I will ever see her again," he said while tears formed in his blue eyes.

"Oh, brother. I had no idea..." Thor pulled his brother in a bear hug. Now he understood Loki's pain and why he blamed himself. It explained everything, and he felt stupid for not being there for his brother when he needed it the most.

"I'm sure we will find her. And I'm sure she'd say yes," he smiled comforting at the raven-haired god, as he finally released him from the embrace.

"How... how did you want to ask her? Did you have something special in your mind?" Thor raised an eyebrow at Loki. He knew his brother was in great pain, still, he couldn't hold his excitement for the thought of Loki proposing to you.

Loki leaned his back against the bed behind him, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath as he fought back his tears.

"I don't know. I just wanted it to be with me, so if the perfect moment comes, I wouldn't miss it. But instead, I missed something more important. I left her alone when she needed me the most. And now I'm constantly failing her with every day I waste here without getting any further in the investigation. I hardly believe she could ever forgive me for this." His voice was shaking, and small tears run down his face, as he was holding the small box in his hands, and stared down at the tiny ring.

It was the only thing left from Frigga he still had. He wanted it to be yours because you were the other woman he loved more than his life. It broke his heart that maybe he could never see you again. That maybe he could never get down on one knee and ask you the question. That maybe he would be left alone forever. Thor's deep voice snapped him out of his mind.

"I think you two will be a beautiful family. Mother would be proud of you." He was sitting next to Loki leaning against the bed, with a smile on his face. Loki was grateful to have this big oaf by his side. It was nice to open up to him a bit. He felt like he had a family again, like when he was a child. Before he found out what he really was.

"Thank you. So... you wanted to talk about something, didn't you?" he put the box aside and looked up at the blonde god.

"Oh, yes, yes. I wanted to ask you to come with me to Asgard. There you could continue the research on the Eternal Flame and..." he hesitated for a moment, but finally said what was on his mind "... the distance from this place, and Lady (y/n)'s things would clear your mind a bit. The others and I are worried about you." He was afraid of Loki's reaction. He expected him to rage and protest, but he seemed to be surprisingly calm.

Loki stood up from the ground and walked to the window. He stared out into the distance with his hands behind his back. His voice was smooth, without any signs of anger:

"I guess you're right. I could use some distraction. If I want to help her, I have to stop dwelling in my sorrow. I need to get myself together and do everything in my power to locate her. I need to be strong enough for the sake of us." He was more likely talking to himself again, but Thor didn't mind it. He could finally see some will to live and fight in his brother.

That night Loki didn't have nightmares, something finally settled in his stormy mind. He spent his last night on Earth in your room. He wanted to feel your presence one last time before leaving to Asgard. He wanted to breathe in your fading scent again before travelling to the distant realm. He felt stupid and a bit ashamed for mourning and letting himself falling apart like you were already dead. Though he was still blaming himself, he found a new will to stand up and make things right. He had to be strong for you because he was sure you were doing the same for him. He loved you more than anything else and wanted to be with you until the very end. He wanted to see that ring on your hand. The conversation with Thor made him realise that there was still a chance to stand up against the Norns, and to fight fate.