With Or Without (Daryl Dixon x Reader)

Wait And Bleed

Daryl and Aaron returned to Alexandria a week later. By the time the two recruits left the walls behind, Daryl's unease and fate was following you everywhere. Yet, even for a moment, they could not scratch your trust in him, your hope, and your assurance that he would return. That he and Aaron would be back together. While Daryl was absent, you apologized to Aiden, Spencer and even to your family, thus relieving yourself of a heavy burden.

Life in Alexandria continued quietly: Your family began to get used to living within this community and you were happy with it. Rick forced Deanna to provide more guards to monitor the perimeter of the towers, not just at the gate. To reassure him, she immediately agreed and quickly studied a number of shifts with Maggie, who had become her counselor. You insisted on joining because you wanted to be more useful outside the walls. Maggie and Deanna granted it to you. A few days ago you actually asked to go with one of the groups who were looking for supplies and received a gentle but dry refusal from Deanna. It reminded you that your help was needed here. From there you gave up, but convinced yourself that you would try again. Before trying to improve your abilities with weapons, you promised to follow Aaron's suggestion and Daryl, Carol, and everyone else who was willing to ask.

In order not to suffer from lack of loneliness, you surrounded yourself with people: You spent more time with Maggie, with Carl and with the rest of the group. You doubled the time of the lessons for the children, which took place on Wednesday and Friday. For them and to teach them more which made you feel good. That's why you stayed in school until late afternoon that Wednesday.

Before you arrived at Rick's in the evening, you decided to make a stopover to cool off and take a shower before going to dinner. When you arrived in front of Rick's house and the others of your family, the words in your throat fell silent, and you stopped to stare at the person smoking under the porch. Your heart started beating furiously in your chest long before you realized that you had Daryl in front of you, just a few steps away from you. He was back. He was fine. He was alive. Daryl noticed you a few seconds later and returned your gaze with an undecipherable expression. Maybe you just imagined it, but it seemed to you that his lips were bent in a small smile.

"Daryl! You're back!", you cheered, standing in front of him struggling not to jump into his arms. During his absence you had often imagined what it would be like to see each other again, in your daydreams you usually threw your arms around his neck and held him in an almost suffocating hug, very close to his strong arms, but the reality was not the same and you could not explain yourself why, maybe you needed to understand how far you could go, with the affection statements opposite a man so cold and contemptuous of physical contact.

"Told ya' so.", he answered and inhaled the smoke.

"Are you alright?", you asked, approaching him without realizing it.

"Yes.", he answered immovably.

"And Aaron?", you asked again.

"He's fine.", he reassured you and stretched casually.

You looked at his eyes, his lips, his hair, his hands, his shoulders: God, how you missed him. All the fear and worry that had followed you in those days vanished as if it had never been there.

"It's nice to see you again, Dixon. Welcome home.", you mumbled and smiled at him, his eyes fixed on you for a moment and you seemed lost in his intense look, which said more than a thousand words, then he snorted and looked uneasily to one side.

"As if.", he snapped and threw aside the finished smoked cigarette. You had such a longing to ask him to tell you how their trip had ended, what he and Aaron had done or saw, but you would have been embarrassed to talk to him about something like that in the company of others. You felt the need to be alone with Daryl, because only you yourselves could feel comfortable in the company of each other. When you were with the rest of your family, you did not talk much. While you did not ignore each other, you limited your interaction to the bare essentials. You did not know if Daryl did it so as not to arouse suspicion or any other reason. You just knew that you wanted to agree, though you thought there was nothing to hide. Or maybe he was the one who was afraid to show something that you would have noticed?