Find My Way Back To You

Chapter 4

--- KILLIAN'S POV ---

I'm working on my ship, while I try to figure out how to skin my bloody crocodile, when suddenly Swan's voice echoes through the air.

"Hi. You mind some company?"

I quickly – maybe too quickly – turn towards her and look at her. Bloody hell. I should just stop looking at her as soon as she enters the room - or my ship in this case - all the time. She left me on the beanstalk to die. I should hate her for it. I should really want her dead or at least honour my whole 'I'm done with you' speech – we're enemies after all. But I just can't. She's obviously attractive as hell and there's just something else about her. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I know it's there. Why else could I read her every thought? Why else would I stare at her as soon as she's close enough. Why else would it take me so bloody long to realize, that there's a baby on her arm?

Now I'm confused. During our whole adventure together back in the Enchanted Forest, Swan only ever mentioned her son and that she needed to get back to him. I always figured, that he's be quite a bit older. And why does she dress her son in a weird clothing piece, that is pink with little purple anchors on it? And why does the baby wear a little bow on her head? I don't know much about this world, but I figured, that the clothes wouldn't get any crazier, but I suppose they did.

But well focusing on more important matters. Why the bloody hell is Swan here? Has she come to grill me some more about Cora? Didn't I make it clear enough the last time she did, that Cora has her own agenda and we aren't really allies here in Storybrooke? How often does she need me to tell her that? Not that I mind her company or that commanding voice she used the last time she interrogated me, but I'd rather have her come here because she wants to be here, than her just doing her job. But I guess, that she'll never visit me voluntarily anyway. Unless her bringing along her son, who looks quite like a girl to me, is a sign of trust. She wouldn't want to endanger him, so I doubt she'd bring him along to my ship, if she thought, that there's a possibility I'm going to hurt him. But that's probably all just wishful thinking on my part. I should stop getting my hopes up since there's nothing worse than giving yourself false hope. It's just going to get my heart broken in the end. I've seen her walls after all and I doubt, that she's ever going to let me break them down. She's probably never even going to admit to herself, that we have a connection. Why does she have to be so bloody guarded and stubborn?

All I am for her is another villain disturbing her home. The quiet town called Storybrooke, in which I'm not welcome. Not at all.

"No. But why exactly are you here, Swan?"

Better get this over with. I know myself, that she isn't here for me, so I once again remind myself to eliminate that little piece of hope in the back of my mind, that refuses to die out. Swan will never care about me and I shouldn't care about her either. I have to work on that – it can't be that hard, right?

Or maybe I don't have to give up on her after all.

She might look at me a little weirdly after I asked her the question, but she's still coming over to me. As soon as she's close, she leans up on her tiptoes and presses her lips on mine. It's only for a few seconds, but even that small kiss makes me totally lose my mind. The way her lips feel against mine is incredible and it just feels...right – like in a weird way, that's where our lips are always supposed to end up: pressed against one another. And even more shocking besides the point that Emma Swan just kissed me out of nowhere is, that it sort of seemed to be a familiar gesture to her – like we've done this before. But I am very sure, that we indeed never did this. Not ever. There's no way, that I wouldn't remember that bloody hell of a kiss. So, maybe this all just proves, that there is a connection between us.