Bad News Babe

chap 1. || jailbird

"I'm not supposed to be here!" I yell to no avail. I am so dead. If I didn't die with embarrassment an hour ago when I got hauled inside that police car, I am undoubtedly dead now.

"Maybe you should've thought about it before you decided to get you ass arrested." A boy my age grins, brandishing a gun with his leather jacket, on the couch facing my cell.

"Can it, will you?" I retort, closing my eyes going to freaking kill me, and tomorrow morning I'm going to end up in a ditch or worse, oh god in heaven. Before I know it, I'm going to be 27, giving birth to triplets in San Diego's women penitentiary and-

"27's not that old you know." He playfully cocks the .44 at me.

"God, don't point it at me!" I feel my heart skip a beat.

"Geez, overreact much?"

"Shut up." He chuckles, tucking the gun back in his jacket.

Okay, I'm only seventeen. They're going to have to let me go, right? I'm going to be sick, my cheek pressed against the cell bars almost hopelessly, eyes pleading for mercy behind the cold exterior of any cop who passes by.

Oh, fuck it. 2:13 A.M. They're never going to let me out. It's been whole 12 minutes. I've done it this time. The only thing relatively bad I've done in, what, the past decade? And the only time I misbehave, I get booked for the night.

It'll be a hilarious joke, they said. No one's going to find out, they said. It wouldn't kill you to stop being a saint, they said.

Apparently, the cops didn't see it as a joke. No, according to them, it was prostitution. Why am I such a bloody idiot?

I've been so careful, and now Hal's probably on his way with her and a guillotine. I can picture Hal Huxley and his Mrs. Hal Huxley to Be, zooming over here like it's the end of the world and then parking half assed on the wrong lane. I honestly don't know what's worse; spending the rest of my life here, getting my ear chewed off by Hal or seeing his thirty-year old girlfriend give him the 'I told you she's bad news' look.

I shut my eyes. Think of a good reason, come on.

Thing is, I don't think Hal is going to buy my 'I was trying to hitch a ride uptown to go to a Mardi Gras in nothing but a trench coat' excuse.

How can I explain what happened to Hal? He won't understand how Carmen and I, swaying hand in hand over the interstate laughed our guts out, crushing autumn leaves beneath our feet, the smell of petrichor lingering in the air. I can still smell it.

"No." I laughed. "We are going to Hayden's party, no stops, no dares, no nothing."

"A little dare won't kill you." Carmen rolled her eyes. "Lil' Miss Prude."

"Hey, I'm doing this for you." I punched her in the arm, earning a yelp from her. "Come on, guys want a teenage girlfriend, not a prudish librarian," she chuckled, hazel eyes glassy as I groaned. "Plus, you're already in nothing but a trench coat already.

"Only because you spilled diet soda on me."

Carmen rolled her eyes. "Psshh... don't exaggerate minor details."

"I'm not! Besides, I am not showing strangers," I paused, gesturing at my chest. "These."

Carmen burst out laughing and I rolled my eyes. Alright, maybe I don't use the word boobs or moon strangers on the highway, but that doesn't make me a prude, right?

"Fine, let's compromise." Carmen managed in between paroxysms of laughter. "Just offer your services to that man over there." She pointed at a cherry colored '98 Ford parked on the side of the road.

"Are you crazy?"

"Relax," she cooed. "You're not actually going to go through with it."

"Huh?"

"Aren't you just adorable?" Carmen remarked in response to my blank stare.  "No wonder Hayden sees you as a little sister." She grinned.

"He so does not see me as a child!" I protested.

"It's just a little gag, alright, Miss Goody Two Shoes?" she mused, which didn't put the rapid beating of my heart or the nausea at ease. "But you don't have to do it if you don't want to."

"Really?"

"Do you want to have a chance with Hayden?"

Funnily enough, she was right. I needed to ditch the good girl image for good if I want to be with guys like Hayden. Or any guy my age at all, really. But Hal would kill me. But this was my chance to do something insane for once. Seventeen for crying out loud. Sure, I deserved to live a little. 

And that was the beginning of the end. Because I briefly recall the next 5 minutes which included "Miss, put your hands behind your back please," from the man- I mean off-duty police officer on a stakeout- in the '98 Ford.

"Don't you go to Lakeside High?" My eyes snap open the the cute guy I'd almost forgotten about, the corner of his lips tucked into a mischievous smirk, and I almost gasp in horror. He's got to be from Lakeside too, but that's impossible. Lakeside's in Seattle which is miles away from New York, so... But if he is and any word of this gets out, I'm so royally fucked.

"Um, no." I look away, mentally wishing my hair would cover at least half my face. "You've got me mistaken for somebody else."

He lets out a low whistle. "No, I think I'd recognize those smoky eyes and pouty lips anywhere," he pauses, grinning.

"Aren't you that chic who tried to auction her friend for Taco Bell?" Ground, open up now and just swallow me now.

"Sorry." I force myself to shrug, although I feel my insides cringing and screaming. It was that one time! And in my defense I was tipsy. Considering what Carmen coaxed me to do tonight, I think it serves her right. If I had a super rich father with an armada of lawyers who bent to my every will like she did, then sure I wouldn't be such a saint. But she doesn't understand what it means to be in my position.

"Where is she?" I know that muffled cry coming from outside the doors. Hal. It's too late, I'm a dead man walking now.