His Guardian Angel

Good Things Come...Never

It had been a week since Negan went back online to game or talk with Bella. They had each other's numbers but Negan got into a bad habit of ignoring it or too damn depressed and busy to reply. He felt like shit and knew she was worrying. He just knew Lucille was fading fast and he didn't know how to fucking deal with it. He was driving too and from the hospital – going to work and dealing with shitheads before coming home to crack open a beer. But every time he'd attempt to get online he'd feel more and more guilty and more and more like an asshole.

He sat in front of his tv in the basement rubbing his face with his hands before taking a sip of his beer. It was then his phone rang.

"Fuck." He whispered. He'd have to face the music eventually.

"Hey, Slugger." Her voice came over the phone. Which caused him to sadly smile.

"Slugger, huh? That your new name for me, now?" He asked leaning into the couch.

"Yup. Tell me, Slugger, why have you been ignoring me? Am I too much of a child for you to deal with?" Her voice was hurt but also very confident. Something he never heard from her before and it sure as shit tickled his balls.

"Baby, I –" He took a breath before explaining. "I'm an asshole, I know. I swear I was gonna call you. I just – Lucille is in the hospital, darlin', she's dying." He heard Bella gasp on the other end of the phone.

"Negan, I'm so sorry. I had no idea, I'm such a dumbass for thinking my problems were so much worse than yours."

He sighed, "Baby, we both have our problems. And I'd love to help you as much as I could." He took another sip of his beer. Waiting for her response.

"Is there anything I can do for you?"

Her question hit him right at home. He wished she was here, with him, in his bed. He wanted to hold her, kiss her, make love to her and be all of her firsts. He wanted to be her man, but life was a bitch.

"What I want, I can't have." He said with slight chuckle. Life was a cruel bitch and maybe this was his karma for being a cheating douche-bag.

"Well, I know we'll meet soon. Just keep me posted on everything okay? If I can help, I will." He smiled, he loved how empathetic she was. She had her problems and baggage but she had an amazing heart. She chose him, and that made all the difference.

"I will, promise." He said in a low tone taking yet another sip of beer.

"Well, I guess I should let you get some rest, I'll be online if you wanna join me." Her voice was gentle but concerned.

Negan nodded, "Okay. Goodnight, baby girl."

"Night, Slugger." He chuckled with a small smile before hanging up. He sighed leaning into the couch, 'Fuck." He whispered to himself. Things were getting complicated and it was only going to get worse.

Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into a month. Negan had been becoming more and more aggressive, more agitated and less of the man he used to be. He quit his job at the high school to stay with Lucille, he'd take on different women almost every week. He hardly spoke to Bella, though she was constantly on his mind. In his mind that's who he was with whenever he was fucking some other woman. He drank more and it was all too consuming until the day Lucille died.

He stood there in his suit at the plot where she was buried. His hair starting to grey more, his beard forming and his phone in his hand with Bella's name on it. He hit the call button and waited for her voice, wondering if it was the last time he'd ever hear it.