3 | Contention ♛Bucky Barnes

Prologue

A loud noise wakes me up from my sleep and my eyes open slowly, taking in my surroundings but i realize i'm at home witch calms me down.

The empty spot beside me on the mattress makes me frown and stand up, walking around to see what's going on.

"Buck?" My whisper seems loud in our quiet apartment and i can hardly see anything since the sun was still down.

Something breaks in the bathroom and i hurry to the door, opening it sighing when it wasn't locked, Bucky stands by the sink, staring in to the mirror at himself, a small strip of moonlight on his face.

"Are you okay?" I place my hand on his metal arm and he flinches grabbing my hand and putting me in a choke hold, but releases me immediately.

"Alex." He whimpers and i widen my eyes, his face full of guilt.

"Hey, it's okay, i'm fine, you didn't hurt me." I grab his face, trying to soothe him but he grabs my hands, shaking his head.

"I can't help it, i'm so sorry." He looks scared to touch me and i sigh, wanting to take away all of his nightmares.

"Bucky, please. It's okay, you've been doing so good." I praise, remembering the first nights together when he would get nightmares and wake up screaming, not remembering me at first.

"I had another one, it was so vivid." He looks down, but my hands are still in his, holding his cheeks.

"Want to talk about it?" I wonder, leading him back to the kitchen, sitting him down on a chair.

"It was dark, but i could see the big metal contraption i was sitting in, straps on my legs and arms, the electricity going through me." He had told me this before, but he only ever talks about it at night, he seems more vulnerable in the dark, at day he tries to hide it, but i can see right through him.

I froze at the thought of that awful torture, i had felt it once, in a vision, and it's on of the things i will never forget.

I sit down in his lap, putting my forehead on his. "You aren't there anymore, you're right here with me."

"I know." He sighs and lightly kisses my cheek. "It actually makes me feel guilty." He adds and i furrow my brows but lightly smile.

"Why?" The question is slow, i already think i know the answer.

"Do you think he's still looking for me?" He answers with another question and i sadly nod.

"Yeah, he told me over the phone, i didn't know what to say." I feel sadness wash over me and guilt, the thought of lying to Steve hurts me.

"I shouldn't force you to lie." I grab his right hand in with both my hands, enclosing it.

"You aren't forcing me, we are doing this in your time, i'm not going to force you to meet him."

He sighs. "I want to, i just need to collect myself, i don't want him to see me like this." I nod, looking at our hands intertwined.

"I understand." I pause, taking a deep breath. "God, I'm so scared." My eyes water but i take one hand out of Bucky's to quickly wipe them.

"Why?" He holds me closer, rubbing small circles on my wrist.

"Because i have been so happy the past two years, i have this bad feeling it's about to end."