*suicide warning*
i was lost in my own world as everyone sat around the tv. jack and jaeden were in the kitchen, looking for drinks. sophia and wyatt were deciding on what to watch. millie and noah were stalking some instagram pages. sadie was making some dinner. and i? i was on my phone, hoping everyone would forget about me. everyone was practically in their own wonderland.
"Gray! Come here! You need to see this!" i walked over to the hysterical millie and sat beside her.
"Yes?" i asked.
She shoved her phone in my face and on the screen was finn and clara. they were practically sucking each other's faces off. i couldn't stand finn alone, but with clara? this was just a disaster duo.
"i bet clara had to pay someone to take a picture of her ugly ass!" noah intervened.
"y-yea" i stuttered.
everyone hated clara. she hated everyone, especially me. she joined the cast in season 3. a complete bitch was what she was.
she would send me messages telling me to kill myself. i would, i didn't need someone to tell me twice.
"fuckers" i heard clara burst through the door, obviously drunk. finn followed behind her, looking very uncomfortable. i could feel the "bitch back the fuck up before i slice you and your drunk ass" vibe just radiating off of him.
"didn't slit your wrists yet, i see?" clara whispered in my ear as she passed me.
"haven't stopped being a bitch, i see?" i remarked back at her.
i felt my phone buzz in my pocket, i already knew who it was. i unlocked my phone to meet the familiar message i saw on a daily basis.
clara: everyone would be better off if you just died
i walked over to jack and jaeden to show them the message.
"hey y'all i just got my daily inspirational message from the one and only bitch, clara, uwu"
"don't listen to her" jack said.
"she can't even act. it's her dad paying the duffers."
he wasn't wrong. clara's dad paid the duffers so she had a guaranteed spot on the show. we all had to go through the whole process of getting cast then this bitch waltz in with her dad's money. i can't believe the duffers even let her on the show. her dad must have paid them A LOT.
"you know she isn't wrong" i muttered low enough so they couldn't hear me.
"what?" jaeden asked.
"nothing"
i was sick of clara's bullshit and constant harassment. she was right. i was better off dead.
"i love you guys. remember never to forget me. i'll haunt you when i'm dead or some shit." i hugged jack and jaeden and walked upstairs. their expressions showed how confused they were. i wasn't.
as i made my way up the stairs, i locked eyes with finn's. i already had tears in my eyes. i quickly wiped them away and turned back.
"Gray? Are you okay?" finn asked.
i kept on walking.
"Gray! Listen to me!"
i ignored him.
"Gray!"
he grabbed my arm and swung me around.
"Get off of me, finn. Go prance around clara. She doesn't want me alive anyways. you hate me as far as i can remember. you stopped hanging out with me after she came, after all."
i shook my hand from his firm grip and continued.
i soon reached my room and locked the door. i laid eyes on every object around me, taking in what i had. i ripped a piece of paper from my notebook.
☆¸¸ .•*¨☆ ☆¸¸ .•*¨☆ ☆¸¸ .•*¨☆ ☆¸¸ .•*¨☆
dear whoever found me dead,
i didn't think it would end like this. i was hoping for maybe a classier setting. you're probably reading this next to my lifeless body. maybe you're wondering why i did this. maybe you're happy i did this. simple explanation, no one cares about me and everyone hates me. it's that simple.
i could probably walk into a room and scream but no one will care to even look my way. my parents don't want anything to do with me. they're better off with me dead, they are the ones who left me. i truly tried my hardest to stay alive. i tried and tried and tried. but nothing was ever good enough. i'm sorry for being a burden to all. have fun without my ass holding you guys back.
and especially to finn,
ok yeah you're annoying sometimes but you're cool. i always seemed like i hated you but i never did. i just had to put on that act so clara didn't kill me. you were my bestfriend. you were the last person to speak to me. you were the last person to ask me if i was okay. you were the last person to care. i pushed you away. just like i did to everyone else.
i hope everyone's happy
☆¸¸ .•*¨☆ ☆¸¸ .•*¨☆ ☆¸¸ .•*¨☆ ☆¸¸ .•*¨☆
i then grabbed a bottle of antidepressants.
"goodbye"
i took a handful of them and shoved them down my throat. i soon heard knocking on my door. i was too weak to reach it. i was already passing out. everything slowly started to fade. i was close. i was so close.
"Gray! Open the goddamn door! Gray! Listen to me!"
i could hear finn banging on the door.
"it's too late finn"
i was gone.
