Why am I Falling? || A Rierra Fanfic

Chapter 6

His heart sank to his feet, why did he call his brother in the first place?

- Ehhmm, yes, it is. Hi Shervin...

- Ramin, how are you? You sound like you're going to cry.

His brother sounded on the edge of crying too, but the fact that he cared more about Ramin's wealth than some family problem made him almost tear up.

- Ummm, I... I... well, I've invited a friend home...

- Yes? Isn't that good? he hesitantly asked.

- Of course, yes. The thing is that I... I kind of... kind of like her...

There was a short pause and Ramin took a deep shaky breath while he waited for his brother to answer. He didn't even know why he felt like crying. Maybe it was because he had missed his brother very much, he didn't really know.

- Well, isn't that great?

- I guess; Ramin replied. But I'm so nervous. I feel like barfing and I don't know what to do with myself.

- Aha, does she like you back? he asked, still being cautious. 

- Don't know, and that's the problem.

Another pause and another shaky breath escaped from Ramin. He had absolutely no idea what to do. What if Sierra only wanted to be friends? After all, they hadn't known each other too long, only for about a month. Still, he felt like he had known her for his whole life. Sometimes he and Sierra had sat in that Starbucks café until it closed and talked about everything and nothing. He loved the relationship they had built up and was terrified to destroy it by revealing his feelings for her.

- Okay... for how long have you known each other?

- Well, she works on Starbucks, and we kind of got to know each other there.

- Aha; he said before he suddenly added. But you usually don't go to Starbucks, do you?

- I know, I didn't, until a month ago when I got a pay rise and wanted to celebrate that. And there she was, and after that we have talked everyday while I was drinking my coffee.

- That sounds... romantic. So what's the problem then?

Ramin sighed. What was the problem? He had a friend. A really good friend, in fact, his only friend, that he liked very much.

- My problem is that I'm in love with her and I have no idea if she likes me back. I don't want to ruin our friendship by asking her about it, but I still can't go on like this. Soon I'll do something stupid that makes her understand and it won't be good, I can promise you that.

Silence again. Even if he knew his brother only wanted him the best and therefore took a while to think, Ramin couldn't help to think that his brother thought very slowly. He drummed his fingers on his thigh while humming a little on his song. Was it even a good idea to invite Sierra in the first place?

- Ramin, I know this will not help you but since I don't know her and don't really know how she acts towards you I can't say anything. The only thing I can say is that if she wants to spend time with you outside Starbucks it certainly means something, and if not romantically, then friendly.

- I don't even know if it was a good idea to invite her...

- Of course it was! his brother exclaimed. Never regret things you have done, only things you haven't done. Even if you're nervous you made the right choice.

- But what if I totally make a fool out of myself?

- I probably know more things about girls than you do, right?

Ramin made some sort of an agreeing noise and Shervin continued.

- So trust me when I say this, if she wants to spend more time with you whatever you do you won't screw it up. If she likes you whatever you do will be cute or polite, and if she just wants to be friends she will think you are funny. You have to be rude to scare her away and if I know you right you would never be rude, it's not in your nature.

This both helped with his nerves a bit, but it also really touched him. That his brother thought so highly of him made him genuinely smile.

- Thanks Shervin! But I have to sleep now, Sierra comes at 10 tomorrow and I have to fix some things before she comes.

- No problems; Shervin said and Ramin could hear that he smiled. And Ramin...

- Yes?

- Good luck tomorrow!

- Thank you. Bye! Love you brother! Ramin said.

- Love you too brother!

And at that they hung up. Even if Ramin still was nervous his heart wasn't beating too fast and he didn't feel like barfing anymore. And when he later went to sleep he felt much more excited about Sierra coming over than nervous and scared.

He jumped up from his bed at 8 the following morning by the sound of his alarm. This was going to be a very interesting day, in many aspects. For the first time since he moved to New York he was going to cook a real lunch and dinner and not noodles (funnily enough). He wasn't really a good chef, but he didn't have enough money to take her out, and he had heard that a good way to impress girls was to cook food own meal and that was exactly what he was going to do. To make it easier for himself he had prepared everything the day before, so he only had to put it in the oven when it was time to eat. By some chance Sierra had told him that she was vegetarian and therefore the meals he was making were vegetarian. However, to be honest he didn't really know what he was making, except it was vegetarian.

When he was done cleaning his apartment for the 24601th time, lost track of how many times he had checked the activity list and brushed his teeth at least 10 times he sat down in his couch with his guitar. It was about 10 minutes left until she would show up, and exactly 10 minutes and 23 seconds left if she would come on the dot. Not that he had checked the clock 3 times already during that minute... Without thinking he started to play his song again. Even if he was proud to have written a song he also felt a little, what to say, ashamed that he played his own song that much. In his world it felt like he bragged when he played his own song. However, it was the only song that suited his situation and the only song he could think of to play.