How Not To Fuck Up a Werewolf Story

Slut-shaming, Tools, and Pops

Hello, I'm June Valentine- if you are here it is highly likely that you either:

A) Want to write a werewolf story.

B) I dragged you here, and forced you to read it.

C) Because you're bored.

I don't really give a shit about either answer you give me, I'm just thankful you are here because I want to clean up Wattpad's act of having some of the most cliché books for the werewolf genre.

Why should I be listening to you?

Good question, because this is my opinion and guess what- it should be common knowledge, not fucking new data. So if I offend you, know that I don't care because you should not be offended- you should've never done this. Like at all.

I also have a few people that ask me for advice, and it'd be easier to have this handy instead.

Enough of my blabbering, let's begin.

The basics- and by this, I mean if you get offended because you do these, I'm offended that you are offended because you shouldn't be offended because you should've never done them.

Lesson one of the Basics:

Don't fucking put pop in your story. I mean pop, like a patch of bright color or like the pop of a yup.

Here are examples of when NOT to use them: (WHICH I SEE IN ALMOST EVERY BOOK)

The mascara made my eyes pop.

"Yup." I said, popping the 'p'.

I don't know why, I don't know if this is just me- but it fucking bugs me to the core to read this, it just annoys me. Maybe because it is over-used?!

Here are examples of WHEN to use them:

The pop, pop, pop of the bubble wrap made his ears twitch.

"Would you like some pop?"

The blood in her ears popped while her anger grew.

I actually use these quite often, and while I hate using the word, it doesn't make me cringe while trying not to purge all over the floor.

Lesson Two of the Basics:

Do not make your male lead say these stereotypical things:

Bro
Man
Sup
Yo
Dude

I go to a school where the guys out-ratio the girls, and the only time they ever think of saying these things is when they're joking. No man in his right mind would say, "Yo, sup dude?" and then be replied back with, "Bro, yo, my man!" -I have legit read books like this-

Acceptable ways to use these words:

"Bro, are you fucking kidding me?" -in the event he loses a video-game.

"Are you kidding me, man?" -in the event he is so pissed he doesn't bother with names.

Sup is not acceptable.