the crying, the wishing, and the hurt.

FIVE

i enjoy destroying myself,
degrading,
hatred,
anything that can make me feel something.
i just want to feel something.
once you've been numb for a while,
you forget what it's like to wake up
and feel something whether it's happiness, excitement, or sadness.
i'd love to feel anything.
sadness included, or maybe it's just
love
that i'm in dire need of.
                                                          {va-la}