Thwip!(Spider-Man Male Reader X Harem)

Prologue

It was a lovely day, Flowers were in bloom, the trees gently rustled in the gentle breeze and a beautiful blue sky............ And Spider-Man was Busy getting thrown through a window by Big Bird himself..... So a typical Tuesday in New York.

Y/N: You know, someone has to pay for all your property damage, right Flying V?

Vulture: Damn Bug. How many times will you try and stop me?!*whispers* I'm getting too old for this Shit.

Y/N: And how many times must I correct you people?!? I'm an arachnid, Not a bug! It's not that complex!

Elsewhere in a Wasteland

Piccolo and Gohan are training

Piccolo: Dodge!

Gohan: Not again Damn I-

He was cut off by a knee to the face.

Piccolo: .............. I feel like someone just said my line.

Gohan: what? "It's not that complex"?

Piccolo: Yeah, that one.

Gohan: Huh, weird.

Back to you

You fired webs at Vulture's wings to try and pull him down to the ground and end the fight quickly

Y/N: Say Adrian, where do you get the tech to keep upgrading your wings?

Vulture: Wouldn't you like to know?

Y/N: Yeah. That's why I asked

As you said that you catapulted yourself feet first into his chest, slamming him into a wall which you promptly followed up with by webbing him to the wall, restraining him.

Y/N: Well Toomes, seems like you're heading back to RAFT for awhile, I'll send you a letter keeping you updated on what's happening, just send me back the pigeon please?

With that you swung off to search for any more crimes, but on the way got a call.

Y/N: Hello?

???Caller: Hey Y/N! How's it going? Are we still up for dinner on Friday?

Y/N: MJ? Uhh, Yeah, we are.

MJ: You alright there N/N?

Y/N: Yeah I'm fine, just a little uh, preoccupied with work at the moment.

MJ: Oh, sorry to bother you when you're "working"

Y/N: why did you emphasize the 'working'?

MJ: Y/N, I know you're busy Jerking off

Y/N: WHAT?!! NO! MJ, you know I'm Spider-Man right? You have literally nursed me back to health countless times after a big fight....

MJ: Ohhhhhh.......... I completely forgot, mainly because you haven't called me in a week!

Y/N: MJ we both know why I haven't called you, I have been busy stopping people like Vulture and Goblin do as they please......

You land on a building and survey the ground below.

Y/N: Alright, I'll make it up to y-

MJ: "You'll make it up to me" yeah, heard it before, never happened.

Y/N: Okay, fine, you win, Saturday we'll spend together, I'll take the day off from being Spider-Man........ Unless every Major Villain I've ever fought teams up, which is really unlikely so I'd say the days free.

MJ:.......... Do you Promise?

Y/N: Huh?

MJ: DO YOU PROMISE?!?

Y/N: Yes! I promise, just don't yell, you're right in my ear.......

MJ: I'm sorry, it's just that....... You never spend time with me anymore.......

Y/N: MJ............

MJ: Alright, I'll let you go, you have people to save. Go get 'em Tiger.

Y/N: Okay MJ. I'll call you later, love you!

MJ: Love you too!

You put your phone away and dive off the building, carrying your momentum into a web swing which leads you to licking a cocaine dealer in the face, knocking him out cold

Thug: Shit! It's Spider-Man!

Y/N: Heya guys! Whatcha sellin'? Coke? I'm more of a pepsi fan myself.(not really, I prefer 7up)

You shot an impact web at a thug and stuck him to a wall, then shot another with a Taser web and followed up with a punch which broke his nose and knocked him out. You dodged as two enemies tried to punch you together but just ended up hitting eachother which you kindly followed up with a kick to the head for both of them, taking them down, another guy rushed you which you responded to by webbing him up and swinging him into a wall, sticking him there.

Y/N: Is this all you got guys? This fight is kinda lame...... But I'm still going to finish it.....

Thug: That's what she sai-

You cut him off by zipping towards him and punching him in the face

Y/N: No! None of that! Shame on you!

You fire a web at another thugs face and pull him past you then flip and kick him on the back of the head Now he can see the future! You quickly dispatch of the rest of the goons and tie them up in webs before swinging off towards your next adventure!....... For about 4 minutes until you're tackled by Venom into an abandoned construction site.

Venom: Hello spidy~ Oh, I forgot to mention, Venom will be the hyper-flirtatious, Nympho in this

Y/N: Oh great, How's it goin' Ellie? Still being villainous?

Venom: Don't you "How's it goin' Ellie? Still being Villainous?" Us, Parker! You know exact why I do what I do.....

Y/N: Ouch, you know there are other ways to pay for things like that?

Venom: Like what? Getting a real job? If you remember rightly, we never got a proper education! We were stuck in that shit-hole of an orphanage until we were of age!

Y/N: Fine then, how about this, give up the symbiote and I will get you a job?

Venom: Not a chance, WE. ARE VENOM. There is no separating us.

Y/N: Fine! New offer: I get you a job if you stop being a villain.

Venom: How can we be sure this isn't a trap?

You take off your mask and the symbiote peels back to reveal her face as well

Y/N: Because it isn't Spider-Man saying it, it's your Friend Y/N........

Ellie(Starting to cry): Th-thank you Y/N

She hugs you and you reciprocate the hug before she grabs your collar and kisses you deeply which you don't fight back against until she fondles your balls and give you her number before swinging off

Y/N(thought): The fuck just happened?

Okay, prologue done, it may be shit but I had a ton of fun writing it so I don't care, I think this may take priority over my RWBY story even though it gets WAAYYY more views, this is just more fun to write...... 'Til the next Chapter!

Songs listened to while writing: The entirety of Green Day's ¡UNO! Album
Ha Ha, you're dead (Green Day)
Misery (Green Day)
Lazy bones (Green Day)

Talon Out