Short Stories

The Dark Place

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. This was the moment of victory, my struggle for freedom. I was letting go of fear and running into the veiled abyss of what lay before me. I was passing through the dark on my journey to the light of the sanctuary.

It was a literal sanctuary. My church sanctuary has a balcony, and part of it wraps around to the lobby on the other side. Between the sanctuary balcony and the lobby balcony are two hallways, one on each side of the circle. These hallways are used for storage, and the average visitor would probably never even notice them. As a child, I spent quite a bit of time at the church with my parents while they went to choir or band practice, deacon meetings, etc, so I got to know the church pretty well. I spent a good amount of time exploring with my sister and my friends. Of all the rooms and passages in the church, those hallways were the most intriguing.

We called it "The Dark Place." The lights were never on up there. I was at least ten years old when I finally learned that there was a light switch. The unknown is the biggest fear among humans, and for six-years-olds, a dark hallway was the very definition of the unknown. Anything could be back there: a monster, a hole in the floor, or just an endless pathway to nowhere. Or, more likely, a bunch of stuff to run in to as you walked by. I never had the courage to just walk through; it took too long. I would get halfway and freak out. I had to run if I wanted to make it through unscathed. I was lucky most of the stuff was pushed to the side, or I would have run right into it.

The scariest things about the hallways were the objects we could see. One of them had a giant globe, right at the entrance to the sanctuary, that jutted out into the center and could be seen looming in the darkness from the other end. It was impossible to make out what was on it, so it just looked like a giant bowling ball. I was afraid it would be too big for me to get past and it would roll over me, or someone or something could be hiding behind it. The hardest part of getting through was the very end, because it meant going past this globe, and entering the sanctuary unaware of our surroundings until we met them.

There were also large banners and a cross in the middle of the hall. The pictures on the banners were of Jesus and bible stories, or they had verses and words of encouragement on them, but these images were distorted in the darkness to look like monsters. The pictures meshed into scary images that could pop right out of the wall and get me if I wasn't fast enough. Even after I learned what they were, I was always a bit weary about walking past them.

The opposite side of the banners had a pew going across it, and behind it was only the rough brick wall. The wall was ominous enough in the light, but in the dark, it was like the inside of a cave. I walked into the dark place with a sense that I would never get out. I would be forever lost in this secret trove and left to cry in confusion until something took me away.

I wouldn't go by myself. Oftentimes my older sister would venture through with me, or my best friend or someone else. It brought such a sense of excitement to us that we just had to push through despite our fears. If we talked to each other along the way, it was a little easier to handle, and we could do it without getting too scared. It took years for me to finally be able to walk it alone without shuddering, and it was only after this that my sister told me about the switch.

I rarely used the switch after that. It helped a few times for me to see what all was in the space, and I would occasionally turn it on just to feel safer, but I stopped after a while. It was always a problem and a hassle to turn it on. The switch was way up behind the door and I could barely even reach it. Besides that, it was only on one side. I would have to go around to that side, and then go back and turn it off before I left. Eventually I decided I could handle going through on the dark to avoid the trouble. This was a shining moment in my life, because I was unwittingly overcoming my fear of the dark, and by extent my fear of the unknown. It started with my sister trying to scare me, and it turned into a major stepping stone in building my character.

The unknown can be frightening to imagine, but I imagined the worst and fought through it anyway until I learned what it was all along, and it wasn't bad at all. I so thoroughly succeeded in my quest, that I now find peace and solitude in the "dark places" whenever I need to think or pray. They were the prisons of my childhood, but they are now my fortress. I find my strength in the trials I've been through. No trial is too small, or even too big, as long as you get something out of it. Strength can come from the most obscure moments in life, and we might not ever know about it until we need it. Don't ever pass up an opportunity to face your fears.