𝑭𝒂𝒄𝒂𝒅𝒆

.nuit.

it was typical for elisabeth and carter to stay up late to finish work mainly because they wanted to get it done but also due to the fact that they tried to avoid each other as much as possible, finding it more awkward each day in having to get to bed together as sad as it was.

they both worked in different offices, the only time they were together in the night was either for work or for sex.

however it was different because of the many fights and arguments they've had.

especially about the one where there was a maybe child added into the situation and not seeing one the same and not being able to look in the eyes of another.

but tonight she decided to face the small fear she had of his yelling and get over the fact that she might not have been right but she wasn't going to lie to herself and say that she was completely wrong.

she took deep breaths before entering the room, carter a bit shocked as it seemed like they had a silent agreement that he would come in the room earlier than she did.

"hey," elisabeth started, closing the door behind her. "i just finished up working.. I mean obviously there's a lot to do but can we talk?"

he nodded his head after a moment as she sighed in relief but the truth was he wasn't angry at her, he couldn't be, he loved her.

he was sad.

because they wanted different things and she got rid of something that he had always wanted.

"i know that it's going to take time," she began to say as she sat on her side of the bed. "but i'm hoping that you can see things from my perspective in order for you to understand why i did what i did."

carter let out a humourless laugh. "that's not fair. that's not fair because you think that you're always right and you always tell me to see it from your point of you- to why? prove that you're right? not this time, lis."

"i'm not saying that i'm right, carter. all i'm saying is that you should understand why I did it."

"i tried!" he yelled as he rubbed his face in frustration.

because the truth was he wasn't working after the fight they had earlier. he was trying to piece together and figure out why she did the things she did and why did it always seem to overpower what he thought was right and usually he would agree with her and move on from it.

but not this time.

not when he didn't have a child anymore.

"i tried, elisabeth for you because i love you and i want to understand- i do. but i just can't." he moved his hands from his face for her to see the small tears that have left his eyes. "i know you didn't want children and i understand that but i thought if it were so to accidentally happen we would figure it out but you didn't give it a second thought."

"you thought about yourself and decided to do what was right for you and i understand you have to be selfish in order to be happy sometimes but you took it too far."

she leaned in closer to him, wiping the tears from his eyes as she sniffled a bit. "i didn't want to hurt you, babe... i just.. i'm scared and i just couldn't see it happening..." she trailed off as he shook his head more tears leaving his eyes. "i'm sorry..." she caved.

sorry's weren't really something she said because she believed that the things she did always made sense and although they weren't in love anymore and he was usually the one to say sorry she couldn't help but feel it as carter struggled to hold in his tears.

she leaned for a small kiss but he moved away from her, getting off the bed. "i can't... i can't forgive you."

"carter..."

"no... no.. i'm done, i can't do this."

"can't do what?"

usually their fights didn't really lead anywhere as someone was always right and someone was always wrong and even though nothing was resolved, they acted like they were as they covered up the emotions they were feeling and hid behind the mask to cover their vulnerability.

this fight wasn't one of those.

which only made her heart beat a little faster and harder.

"i can't just look at you every single day like i don't remember what you did and forgive you for something that shouldn't be forgiven."

"so what was i supposed to do then? was i supposed to keep the baby so you could be happy? what would you have wanted because i just really don't know."

he shrugged, shaking his head as he walked closer to the door. "i love you, elisabeth but i can't keep pretending like everything is okay whether it's on camera or off. i need a break."

"i don't understand," she said in confusion as she got off the bed too. "need a break from what.. the media, the business-"

"from you," he finished, looking away. "i think we've held in too much that there's not even enough words to describe the amount of anger we have but we're always just told to keep quiet for the publicity but i think that we've forgotten when and where to keep quiet because look for where this has gotten us."

"no," she said shaking her head, the first tear leaving her eye, "you don't get to blame this marriage on me, you asked me to marry you."

"and you said yes!" he exclaimed, putting on his jacket. "we both wanted different things, i sacrificed for you and you sacrificed for me yet we still end up both being selfish."

and the pain she felt in her heart hurt because he was all she's known for years.

keep it together, she told herself.

but the truth was she didn't really know if she could.

she somehow managed too.

"so you want a divorce?" she asked.

"no... no just a break."

"what the fuck is a break going to do, carter? if anything it's going to hurt us even more," she almost yelled as he saw him packing a bag. "why are you packing? you're not leaving me, we need to fix this." She threw his stuff out of the bag. "we need to fix this, baby please."

but he didn't think he could anymore, holding in their emotions for years was already too much. "i think we just need time to ourselves and think about everything- i need to think about everything." he continued packing or tried to at least as she continued to throw stuff out, throwing it at him.

"or to think if you want to leave me forever or not right?" but before he could answer she continued on. "you know what? you're right, absolutely fucking right. we do need a break and i'm so glad we are," she said as she sat back on the bed.

"okay." he didn't have the energy to fight anymore. "i'm going to go to a hotel if you need me, alright and when we're ready we can talk."

he zipped up his bag, opening the door and before closing it, he whispered her name one more time before leaving.

"i love you," he said but he knew wasn't going to get a reply back as he closed the door after he said it.

that night she cried herself to sleep with her pillow the only proof of anyone knowing the tears that were shed.

and the sad part was that she had to put on a mask the next day and act like she was okay and that their marriage was fine and that she was happy and in love

when really she wasn't.

Sucky but eh I just know it'll get better when Harry's in it Lmaoo