I'm broken (Destiel)

Bitter water

Cas's eyes softened as he gazed at Dean with a sad look in his eyes. He moved aside a stack of books and pulled himself a chair, becoming level with Dean.  "Dean," he started , "Is there anything on your mind that you want to share with me?" Dean sat straight up, mentally filing through everything he did within the past 36 hours. 

"No cas, is something wrong? You seem a little worried. Is it something about heaven? Michael?" Dean leaned into the conversation, searching Cas's eyes for some sort of answer. All he got in return were sad eyes, glazed over with concern.

"No, Dean, I'm just wondering if you're doing okay. You don't always have someone to ask if you are, and I figured it's ahout time you did." Dean shook his head adamantly, scoffing at Castiel's statement. 

"Cas, if this is about Micheal, or yesterday's hunt, I'm perfectly fine, okay? You don't need to worry about me, I always bounce back." Dean started to turn back to his lore book, but suddenly obstructed by Caa's  hand on his shoulder. Dean stiffened, slightly annoyed by Cas's pestering.

"Cas, whatever this is about, I'm busy so; in the most polite way possible: fuck off." Cas strengthened his grip on Deans shoulder, making his commitment to the conversation clear.

"No, Dean you're not fine. You were possess by micheal, you've died over and over again, seen everyone you care about- including me- die, and you've never talked to anyone about it. For give me for being intrusive, but believe it or not, I may be one of the few people in your life who've ever wondered, but I know for a fact I'm the only one who's going to insist: how are you really?" 

At this point, Dean had pushed off cas's Hand and stiff from his chair. "Cas, I don't want to talk about it! Give it a break." All the alarms in his mind were going off and the defense mechanisms were coming up. He started to stomp off to his room with his book in hand when cas blocked his way from out of the library. 

"Dean!" Cas attempted to reach for his schoupder again but dean slapped his hand away before it could rest familiarly on his arm. 

"Why the hell do you care anyways? We're friends, best friends- I get that- but we aren't mushy gushy people. Why do you even care so much anyways? What happened last night that all of a sudden you'rs De  Phill!" Cas's expression became melancholy as he watched dean stomp the rest of the way to his room. He opened his mouth to speak but all he could taste in his mouth was defeat. It was bitter water.