VOLTRON LEGENDARY DEFENDER || C R A C K [discontinued]

A series of Lance and Shiro

Lance: if I were trapped in a room full of explosives and the only way out was to eat a whole tomato I would die.

Keith: how would you even get in that situation?

Lance: Ask Tumblr

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Lance: how much dirt would you have to throw into the ocean to make an island?

Shiro: What in the actual fuck Lance

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Shiro: Lance, last night you were talking in your sleep.

Lance: What did I say? 

Shiro: "time to bedazzle everything."

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Lance: GUYS! Christmas doesn't feel like christmas anymore...

Shiro: Lance—

Lance: Like, its hardly real and—

Hunk: I thought I was the only one!

Pidge: ITS SO SAD

Allura: Whats Christmas 

Shiro: Guys... hate to break it to you... its called growing up.

Lance: PLEASE MAKE IT STOP

Pidge: IM SORRY FOR MY SINS

Hunk: I WONT EAT ALL THE COOKIES SANTA PLEASE GIVE US BACK CHRISTMAS

Allura: But what is Christmas...?

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Lance: I went to church once.

Keith: Only once?

Lance: They were reading a passage and it said, "very god". 

Keith: So?

Lance: So without trying to be quiet, I say, "MUCH CHRISTIANITY".

Keith: ... oh...

Lance: They kicked me out.

Keith: What did you think about that?

Lance: I just looked at the priests and said, "So religion."

Pidge: You queen.

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Lance: If I cut off my foot and hit you am Still kicking you or just hitting you?

Keith: You'd be lying on the ground, dead.

Lance: Okay but which—

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Shiro: what if phobias were based off of how you died in your past life.

Keith: You're banned from Lance now Shiro.

Lance: Huh. I died from life?

Keith:

Keith: I'm stealing Lance from you Shiro.

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Lance: Whats missing: A,E,_,O,U?

Shiro: I?

Lance: Whats the oppisite of hate?

Shiro: Love?

Lance: Whats the oppisite of me?

Keith: Someone worth breathing?

Shiro: I do love someone worth breathing.

Lance: ...oh

Shiro: Babe I meant you don't be like that—

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Lance: *drops several limes*

Lance: *trues to pick the up but fails*

Lance: *gets Shiro's attention*

Lance: *finally gathers limes sheepishly*

Lance: sorry, I'm bad a pickup limes.

Shiro:

Shiro: *marries Lance*

Because Klance and SHANCE are necessary