Tragic Love [Champion, By Marie Lu]

Glowing Star

        Two weeks later, what feels like the entire city of Los Angeles turns out to see Julian leave the country for good. On the morning I left Julian’s beside, Antarctica came calling for both him and his brother. They’d taken note of Eden’s gifted touch with engineering and offered him a place in one of their academies. At the same time, they offered Julian the chance to go along.

                                                                                ***

            I put on my boots and a coat, then wrap a thin scarf around my neck and head out into the streets. My hair blows in the balmy night breeze, wisps catching now and then on my lashes. For a while I wander the quiet roads on my own.

            He’s already gone, and his absence leaves a hollow, aching pain in my chest. My eyes water from the wind, or maybe just the thought of Julian.

            I walk for an hour before I finally take a short train ride to Lake sector. I don’t know where I’m going. All I know is that, in this moment, Lake sector seems more like home to me than Ruby does, because I had Julian.

            I can still feel the beating of his heart. Whereas, my heart is falling apart, and my heart begins to cry for Julian’s warmth, and recognition.

            I began to retrace my old steps, past the same lakeside buildings and crumbling homes, the steps I’d taken when I was a completely different person, full of hate and confusion, loss and ignorance. It’s an odd feeling to wander these same streets as the person I am now. At once familiar and strange.  I glance around, and realize how familiar, but distant this all is. I will never understand Julian’s life. I begin to contemplate situations in my mind.

            What is I never met Julian? What if Metias was still alive, as well as Julian’s family? Living life like I normally would, like we normally would. But then I would have never discovered how sinister the Republic was, nor I wouldn’t have had the honor to be with Julian. But, then again, my heart wouldn’t have been ripped out of me. Would I have found love? But who, if not Julian? Would I rather sacrifice Metias for Julian, or Julian for Metias. I shake my head vigorously, losing the horrible thought, as tears fall aimlessly down my cheeks.

                                                                                        ***

            An hour later, I pause alone before a nondescript alleyway that branches off an empty street.  I step into the shadows of the building, remembering. This is where Julian had first reached his hand out for me in the midst of smoke and dust and saved me so long ago, before we even discovered who the other was; this was the start of the few precious nights when we simply knew each as a boy on the streets and a girl who needed help, and who still does. I desperately want to go back to that night. Any night, as long as I have Julian.

            The memory comes into sharp focus.

            There’s a voice telling me to get up. When I look to my side, I see a boy holding out his hand to me. He has bright blue eyes, dirt on his face, and a beat-up old cap on, and at this moment, I think he might be the most beautiful boy I’ve ever seen. The rest of the world freezes around us, as I stare into his crystal blue sea, which takes me in. We stare at each other for a while, with his hand caressing my face. His hand slowly slips down my face, and a look of confusion, invades his passionate expression. “Who are you?” he spits out at me. I instantly feel my heartbreak, and I collapse to the ground.

            I open my eyes, and tears stream down my face. I try to lose the thought.

            I look around again, up toward the rooftops and then all the way to the night sky where a few faint stars can be seen. Then there’s a really bright star.  Julian, I think.

            Julian is my glowing star, no matter where we go; he will be there, glowing bright, to shine the way for everyone that has crossed his path.

            I love you, until the day we meet again. I will hold you in my heart and protect you there, grieving what we never had, cherishing what we did. I wish you were here.

            I love, and I will always love you, until my legs stop kicking, and my lungs stop breathing, for your presence.

            “Maybe, when am dead,” I say to the star, that I named Julian. “I will continue to call for you, even though the dead can only hear, and maybe, just maybe, we can be together in the afterworld.”

            I sit back, and close my eyes, bathing in the smell, and warmth, of my one, and only love, Julian.