Catch Me

Day 5

"I'll be right back."

"Where are you going?" Wanda asks drowsily from your king-sized bed.

Following a particularly grueling mission today, she came by your room because she didn't want to be alone. This isn't the first time she has done this and you highly doubt that it'll be the last. Impromptu sleepovers have become the norm since befriending Wanda and you don't mind them in the slightest. There's comfort in going to bed at night knowing that you're not alone.

"I'm going to grab a snack."

"Okay," she yawns, pulling your blanket up to her shoulders and letting her eyes flutter shut.

The halls of the tower are quiet as you stroll down to the kitchen. You enjoy these late night walks. They grant you the ability to let your mind wander and, after witnessing firsthand how drained Wanda was after getting back from her mission, you start to think about the price of being an Avenger. Yes, you live in an obscenely expensive tower. Yes, you know someone with deep pockets who is willing to get anything that money can buy. Yes, you get to be surrounded by like-minded people who all want to make the world a better place, but is that enough?

In the same way that the world rewards you for being an Avenger, it also finds a plethora of ways to punish you. You withstand physical damage on an almost regular basis. Missions are emotionally draining. After spending so much time fighting criminals and enemies, you unconsciously but constantly look for the bad in people before the good. And worst of all, you have to accept that coming out of a mission alive is not guaranteed; there is nothing more psychologically grueling than repeatedly having to accept that each one might be your last.

So, in the long run, is it worth being an Avenger when there are just as many consequences as there are benefits?

"Y/N."

You snap out of your internal debate and find Bucky standing a couple feet away from you. He is dressed in his standard lounging attire - sweatpants and a long-sleeve shirt. "Yeah?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yes," you say, voice laced with confusion. "Why are you asking?"

"You look really dazed. And you have a crease right there," he points to the spot in between your eyebrows. "That means you're thinking about something serious."

You smooth out the spot with your pointer and middle finger self-consciously, completely unaware that you had a tell that gave away what was going on in your head. You also didn't know that Bucky paid enough attention to you to know about it.

"So today's mission was pretty long, huh? You were gone all day."

Bucky leans against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest with a coy grin. "Miss me?"

"Nope."

His confident mask falters. "You really know how to bruise a man's ego, doll."

"You'll be fine," you say with a wave of your hand. "Anyways, I need to get going. The kitchen is calling my name."

You've just started walking away when Bucky wraps his fingers loosely around your wrist. "Bucky," you complain when he doesn't let you go. "I'm hungry."

"It's almost midnight."

"Steve's already lectured me a hundred times about how bad it is to eat late at night. I don't need to hear it from you too."

"It's almost midnight," he repeats as if saying this again will make everything fall into place for you.

"You're being very cryptic and I don't understand why."