Hopeless || m.yg

Eight

"I could love you; I know I could. You didn't arrive at the right time, however, so I must say farewell to 'what could be'. I'm caught in a perpetual state of 'I only want you,' but you are not the 'you' I speak of. For that I am sorry, but I can't hurt you the way I've been hurt. I'd never wish that on anybody, but especially not you."
--Me

>>>+<<<

I wake up to texts sounding on my phone, a total of four texts. One from Jimin, one from Alex, and two from Yoongi. I first look at Alex's and then Jimin's and lastly Yoongi's, leaving a reply to each message before moving along to the next.

Daisy<3: Good morning, Minnie~ I had an early shift this morning. Don't forget, your shift starts at 3. It's on the calendar. Make sure you eat something this morning. I'll be home for my lunch at 1. I love you~
Me: Thanks for reminding me; I would've forgotten. I'll eat some cereal and I'll head into work when you go back after your lunch and just clock in early :)

Loverboy~: Good morning :)) Just thought I'd let you wake up to a good morning text. I hope you have a great day; I'll be at work all day or else I'd come see you.
Me: That's okay Jiminie. Next time I see you I think we should talk though, so maybe when you get off work tonight??

My (ex) Love: Good morning, beautiful. I know we aren't together, but like I said last night: I will try my hardest until you realize I'm not playing with you. I still love you and I've never stopped. You are the love of my life and I hope to heaven and hell we end up together for the rest of our lives. I don't want to wait any longer, but I'll wait as long as it takes you to be okay with this again.
My (ex) Love: Oh, and I almost forgot to say I love you, Suk Jaehwa. I don't care whether you say it back or not, I want you to know that I love you :)
Me: Yoongi, it's not that I need to realize that you aren't playing with me. I know you better than I know anyone else. I know you're not lying. But I'm going to have a lot of trouble trusting you for a long while, which is totally understandable. You broke my heart. And as much as I hate it, you're always the one I hand the already shattered pieces of my heart to fix for me.

I finish up with my texts and get up, making my way into the bathroom to start my morning routine. When I finish there, I go back to my bedroom to get dressed for the day. I put on my work clothes so I don't have to change later and I put on a pair of comfy socks to wear around the house. 

I make my way downstairs and to the kitchen, grabbing a bowl from the cupboard and pulling cereal out of the pantry. I fix my bowl of cereal with just the right amount, grab a spoon, and walk into the living room, sitting down on the couch and turning on the TV. 

I flip through some channels until I find some game show I enjoy and start munching. I get about halfway through my cereal when I hear a text come through on my phone. I finish my cereal, not in a hurry to check my message, and take my bowl to the kitchen to wash.

I come back out to my spot on the couch and pull my phone out of my pocket. It's a text from Jimin.

Loverboy~: Tonight's fine. I can leave anytime after 8. What's it about?
Me: It's a little too important to talk about over text, as easy as it would be to say now. I have work until closing at 8:30, so if you want to come by my apartment, I should be eating with Alex. 

I wish this were something I could say through text. It would be much easier and less stressful. I wouldn't have to see his hurt expression and I wouldn't have to stare him in the eyes when I break his heart.

But some things must be done in person. This is one of those things. 

>>>+<<<